The Departed2006

Dignam:
Your f***in' family's dug into the Southie projects like ticks. Three-decker men at best. You, however, grew up on the North Shore, huh? Well, la-di-f***in'-da. You were kind of a double kid, I bet, right? Huh? One kid with your old man, one kid with your mother. You're upper-middle class during the weeks, then you're droppin' your "R"s and you're hangin' in the big, bad Southie projects with your daddy, the f***in' donkey on the weekends. I got that right? [Costigan does not answer] Yup. You have different accents? You did, didn't you? You little f***in' snake. You were like different people.

Billy Costigan:
You a psychiatrist?

Dignam:
Well, if I was I'd ask you why you're a Statie making 30 grand a year. And I think if I was Sigmund f***in' Freud I wouldn't get an answer. So tell me, what's a lace-curtain motherf***er like you doing in the Staties?

Billy Costigan:
Well, "Families are always rising and falling in America", am I right?

Queenan:
Who said that?

Billy Costigan:
Hawthorne.

Dignam:
Pfft! What's the matter, smart ass? Don't know any f***in' Shakespeare?

Queenan:
We have a question: Do you want to be a cop, or do you want to appear to be a cop? It's an honest question. A lot of guys just want to appear to be cops. Gun, badge, pretend they're on TV.

Dignam:
Yeah, a lot of people just wanna slam a n*gger's head through a plate-glass window.

Billy Costigan:
I'm all set without your own personal job application. Alright, Sergeant?

Dignam:
What the f*** did you say to me, trainee?

Billy Costigan:
[to Queenan] With all due respect, sir, what do you want from me?

Dignam:
Hey a**hole, he can't help you! I know what you are, okay? I know what you are and I know what you are not. I'm the best friend you have on the face of this earth, and I'm gonna help you understand something, you punk. YOU'RE NO F***IN' COP!

Queenan:
He's right. We deal in deception here. What we do not deal with is self-deception. Five years from now, you can be anything else in the world, but you will never be a Massachusetts State Trooper.

Billy Costigan:
You sure of that?

Queenan:
I'm sure.

Dignam:
Guaran-f***ing-teed. You got a 1400 on your SATs, kid. You're an astronaut, not a Statie.