2 Broke Girls2011

Caroline Channing:
My new sheets from the Under A Dollar store feel so luxurious. Like maybe they could cost over a dollar. Maybe even two or three.

Max Black:
Yup. It was a good day over at the Under A Dollar. Steak, bed stuff and my new steak-eating chair.

Caroline Channing:
Doesn't it worry you that you got meat and furniture for the price of an Angry Birds update?

Max Black:
Yeah, it worries me that it'll never happen again. Sheets and steak? Never dare to dream it.

Caroline Channing:
These sheets smell amazing too. Thanks to that one little fabric softener ball, also under a dollar.

Max Black:
I dated a guy with one ball once. He was all self-conscious, but I told him, "No big deal, it's just as ugly as two."

Caroline Channing:
I am gonna get such a good night...

[Caroline pulls back the bed sheet, ripping it]

Caroline Channing:
Oh, sheet!

[Caroline runs to the box and reads it]

Caroline Channing:
"Thread count: yes. Washing instructions: Do not wash." Are you sure you want to sit in that?

Max Black:
Woman, don't talk to me while I'm eating my steak.

[Max goes to sit down in the chair but her butt rips through the chair and she falls to the floor, Max then reads the tag on the chair]

Max Black:
"Instructions: Do not sit."