Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Like a soda pop left open all night, Bueller seems to have lost its effervescence over time. Sure, Matthew Broderick is still appealing as the perennial truant, Ferris, who fakes his parents out and takes one memorable day off from school. Jeffrey Jones is nasty and scheming as the principal who's …






Grace:
[picks up ringing phone] Ed Rooney's office.

Cameron:
[disguising his voice] This is George Peterson.

Grace:
Oh! Uh, please hold. [to Mr. Rooney] What do ya know? It's Mr. Peterson. You still want his daytime number? [realizing] Oh.

Mr. Rooney:
[on the phone] Ed Rooney.

Cameron:
Ed. This is George Peterson.

Mr. Rooney:
How are you today, sir?

Cameron:
Well, we've had a bit of bad luck this morning as you may have heard.

Mr. Rooney:
Yeah, I heard, and, ooh, I'm all broken up. Boy, what a blow.

Cameron:
Yeah. Yeah. Well, uh, it's been a tough morning, and, uh, we got a lot of family business to take care of, so if you wouldn't mind excusing Sloane, I'd appreciate it.

Mr. Rooney:
Uh, sure. Y'know, I'd be happy to. Yeah. You, uh, you-you just produce a corpse, and, uh, I'll release Sloane. I wanna see this dead grandmother first hand.

Grace:
[suspiciously] Ed?

Mr. Rooney:
[covering the phone; thinking he's talking to Ferris Bueller] It's alright, Grace, it's Ferris Bueller, the little twerp. I'm gonna set a trap, and let him fall right in it.

Grace:
Ooh!

Cameron:
Uh, uh, Ed, I-I'm sorry, did-- Did you say you wanted to see a body?

Mr. Rooney:
Yeah, that's right, just, uh, roll her old bones on over here, and I'll dig up your daughter. You know, that's school policy.

Cameron:
Oh?

Mr. Rooney:
Uh, was this your mother?

Cameron:
Uh, n-no, my wife's mother.

Grace:
[picks up ringing phone] Ed Rooney's office.

Ferris:
Hi, this is Ferris Bueller. Can I speak to Mr. Rooney, please? Thank you.

Grace:
[caught off-guard] Uh... hold.

Mr. Rooney:
Tell ya what, dipshit. You don't like my policies, you can come on down here and smooch my big ol' white butt.

Grace:
[loud whisper] Ed!

Mr. Rooney:
Pucker up, Buttercup. [to Grace; quietly] What?

Grace:
Ferris Bueller's on line 2.

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