Blackadder

[Blackadder is meeting "Bob" Parkhurst, whom he realises is actually a woman disguised as a man]

Blackadder:
So you're a chap, are you, Bob?

Bob:
Oh yes, sir. [bursts out laughing and growls like a tiger]

Blackadder:
You wouldn't say that you were a girl at all?

Bob:
[nervously] Oh, definitely not sir! I understand cricket, I fart in bed, everything.

Blackadder:
Let me put it another way, Bob. You are a girl. And you're a girl with as much talent for disguise as a giraffe in dark glasses trying to get into a "Polar bears only" golf club!

Bob:
[Horrified] Oh sir, oh sir, please don't give me away, sir. I just wanted to be like my brothers and join up. I want to see how a war is fought... so badly!

Blackadder:
Well, you've come to the right place, Bob. A war hasn't been fought this badly since Olaf the Hairy, High Chief of all the Vikings, accidentally ordered eighty thousand battle helmets with the horns on the inside.

Bob:
I want to do my bit for the boys, sir!

Blackadder:
Oh, really..?

Bob:
[pleading] I'll do anything, sir!

Blackadder:
Yes, I'd keep that to myself if I were you.