Monk, Season 4

[Monk can't concentrate due to a fresh dog mess]

Natalie:
Mr. Monk, are you okay? Everybody's waiting.

Monk:
It's over there.

Natalie:
What?

Monk:
Dog... you know. Dog... doo.

Natalie:
Did you step in it?

Monk:
[looks at Natalie like she's crazy] If I stepped in it, I'd be in that ambulance right now, on my way to the emergency room, wouldn't I?! Praying for the sweet release that only death can bring!