Border Law

[Thunder accidentally flips a flapjack into the campfire]

Jim Houston, Texas Ranger:
Tastes better if you catch 'em.

Thunder Rogers, Texas Ranger:
Son, I've made seven million of these flapjacks and that ain't happened to but nine of 'em.

Jim Houston, Texas Ranger:
What of it?

Thunder Rogers, Texas Ranger:
Bad luck, that's what. Whenever I miss a flapjack it means trouble - and plenty of it!

Thunder Rogers, Texas Ranger:
Well, what are we waitin' for?

Jim Houston, Texas Ranger:
Aw, keep your shirt on. Be suicide to start a shootin' match now. Besides, we want 'em all. We're takin' 'em back with us.

Thunder Rogers, Texas Ranger:
Yeah, but how?

Jim Houston, Texas Ranger:
I don't know. I've got to think.

Thunder Rogers, Texas Ranger:
With what?

[Tonita kisses Jim's wanted poster]

Tonita:
How do you like that, Senor Bad Man? No no, no more. One kiss - nice. Two kiss is dangerous. Three kiss - nooo!

'Pegleg' Barnes:
See that there limb? [holds up his peg leg] That comes from the tree where Sitting Bull used to sit.

Jim Houston, Texas Ranger:
No!

'Pegleg' Barnes:
Come by my barber shop and I'll give you everything from a haircut to a bath.

Jim Houston, Texas Ranger:
Thanks, pardner. I'll take the haircut, but you can give him [Thunder] the bath.

Thunder Rogers, Texas Ranger:
Aw, I ain't dirty.

Jim Houston, Texas Ranger:
I suppose that's sunburn, huh?

[reviewing the rules before Jim and Dave's fight]

Shag Smith:
Alright, boys, everything goes but quittin'.

[Jim has been wounded in a gunfight]

Tonita:
Are you shot, Jimmy?

Jim Houston, Texas Ranger:
Only half shot, honey.