Edmund Blackadder:
Baldrick, your brain is like the four-headed, man-eating haddock fish-beast of Aberdeen.

Baldrick:
In what way?

Edmund Blackadder:
It doesn't exist.

Edmund Blackadder:
Oh damn! One measly civil war in the entire history of England and I'm on the wrong bloody side!

Edmund Blackadder:
We will enter a hideous age of Puritanism. They'll close all the theaters... lace handkerchiefs for men will be illegal... and I won't be able to find a friendly face to sit on this side of Boulogne!

Baldrick:
I have a cunning plan to save the king.

Edmund Blackadder:
Ha! Well forgive me if a don't do a cartwheel of joy; your family's history in the department of cunning planning is about as impressive as Stumpy O'Leg McNolegs' personal best in the Market Harborough marathon.

Edmund Blackadder:
Shut up, with the greatest respect, your Majesty.

Edmund Blackadder:
Shut up, with the deepest respect, your Highness!

Edmund Blackadder:
The Earl he had a thousand sovereigns, hey-nonny-no/He gave them all to the man with the ax-oh... (Blackadder's ballad to King Charles, in a characteristic attempt to seperate the king from his money before seperating the king from his head)

King Charles I:
Wait a minute - that voice has a familiar ring! And so does that finger!

King Charles I:
Blackadder, you're disguised as a priest! How dangerously stupid and perverted. It's just like school!