Phyllis:
Oh, what glorious patches!

Jamie:
Thank you, ma'am.

Phyllis:
Where can I buy them?

Cleo:
Ma'am, you don't buy them, you earn them.

Phyllis:
Oh! Like jewelry!

Phyllis:
You never give me credit for anything I do.

Freddy:
That's because you never do anything!

Freddy:
You had so much energy, you were so creative, I couldn't wait to see what you'd do with it. And see, now I know what you did with it. You Went Shopping!

Phyllis:
Hey, I went shopping, Buster, to furnish your perfect house, to build your perfect image, to be your perfect Beverly Hills wife!

Claire:
So much for being normal.

Phyllis:
Her recommendations for a campsite were totally unsuitable. There were no outlets. And there was dirt, and bugs, and... and it rains there. So anyway, we've found a place that's much more us: the Beverly Hills Hotel.

Phyllis:
I may be a beginner at some things, but I've got a black belt in shopping!

Velda:
You call this roughing it?

Phyllis:
One bathroom for nine people? Yes.

Rosa:
Patches? We don't need no stinkin patches.

Phyllis:
The parents here are so self involved. Shit, I broke a nail!

Freddy:
If you contributed anymore to this marriage, we would be on welfare.

Hannah:
It's about time you two grew up.

Phyllis:
That just frosts my cookies!

Annie:
You can't put wine in Hobo stew!

Phyllis:
Why not? What goes better with Hobos than wine?

Phyllis:
This dance is called "The Freddie." I know, I know. Life is so ironic.