Spenser:
Because you're on the board of the Port City Theater, and because the director thinks he's being stalked, I have to endure two hours of lousy drama?

Susan Silverman:
No. Because Jimmy Christopholous is a friend, because you are my honey, because sleuthing is your business, and because you will enjoy the ultimate theater party for two this evening.

Spenser:
Hey, I'm willing to tell you all I know.

Chief DeSpain:
You haven't told me squat.

Spenser:
True, but it's all I know.

Chief DeSpain:
Well, you learn anything, you dash right on in and tell us about it. 'Cause we're fightin' crime up here, day and night.

Spenser:
This may not be a routine murder. Most murders don't happen in a crowded theater.

Spenser:
So the killing might be connected to the play, so I need someone to... tell me what the play was about.

Lou Montana:
Ahem. Lou Montana. I directed. And, uh, your question is absurd.

Spenser:
No; an actor getting shot on stage wearing tights while singing "Land of Love" is absurd.

Lou Montana:
Ah. And what was your response to the play?

Spenser:
I found it a pretentious mishmash about appearance and reality.

Lou Montana:
Well, art isn't "about"

Lou Montana:
anything. It *is* movement and speech in space and time.

Spenser:
Thank you!

Lou Montana:
I didn't expect you'd understand.

Spenser:
Me either.

Spenser:
Could you arrange for me to have lunch with her?

Susan Silverman:
I'm not sure she'd be willing to meet with you.

Spenser:
Mention to her about me being hunk city!

Susan Silverman:
That ought to do it.

Lonnie Wu:
It is unseemly for her to be having lunch with a lo fan.

Spenser:
Is "lo fan" a term of racial endearment?

Lonnie Wu:
It means "barbarian". Someone who is not Chinese.

Spenser:
So you don't fully subscribe to the melting-pot theory?

Lonnie Wu:
I'm not here to make small talk. It would be best if you stayed out of Port City.

Spenser:
Is it okay if I retain my U.S. citizenship?

Lonnie Wu:
What you choose to do outside of Port City is your business. But if you choose to come back, we will make it our business, and I will not be able to protect you.

Spenser:
Protect me from whom?

Lonnie Wu:
From me.