The Pacifier

Lulu:
Why are your b*obs so big?

Shane Wolf:
They're not b*obs.

Shane Wolf:
I think it's time you went nappy-poo in beddy-bye land.

Lulu:
Do I look like I'm five to you?

Lulu:
Land! Solid Land!!.

Shane Wolfe:
Atten-hut! Here's our man. Professor Howard Plummer. He's been kidnapped by a group of Serbian rebels.

Scott:
Yo, fool, handle me like that again and I'll lay knuckles upside your head.

Zoe:
Okay! Enough is enough! Come on, Scott. Let's go. Come on.

Shane Wolfe:
[pulls Scott back] No, you don't. Get back here. Give me 20.

[Scott pulls out his wallet to give Shane $20]

Shane Wolfe:
I meant push-ups!

Scott:
Zoe?

Shane Wolfe:
Drop down! Do 20! [Scott does push-ups]

Seth:
What are you doing?

Shane Wolfe:
You're burning daylight! Move!

Seth:
It's Sunday. And it's 6:00 am! You're insane!

Lulu:
Do you know kung-fu?

Shane Wolfe:
Yes.

Lulu:
Have you ever punch a guy so hard his head came off?

Shane Wolfe:
No.

Lulu:
Why are your b*obs so big?

Shane Wolfe:
[shocked] They are not... b*obs.

Lulu:
Do you have to wear a bra? Will mine be as big as yours one day?

Shane Wolfe:
You know what, little girl? I think it's time you went nappy-poo in beddy-bye land.

Lulu:
Do I look like I'm five to you?

Shane Wolfe:
What did I say?

Lulu:
Disrespectful. And to think I was interested in you.

Helga:
[to Shane] Tell me, are you licenses to kill?

Shane Wolfe:
...No.

Helga:
Hmm. Too bad. It could have come in handy.

Bill Fawcett:
Any last words, Shane?

Shane Wolfe:
Say good night, Peter Panda.

[The safe opens up, and knocks Bill on the head and knocked him to the floor.]

Julie Plummer:
Shane, are you okay?

[Julie punches Mrs. Chun the face.]

Julie Plummer:
She was never a good neighbor.

Shane Wolfe:
Gary, now!

[Gary eats Mr. Chun in the crotch and screaming. Claire kick the back patch, roll on my back again and feet with my neck.]

Claire Fletcher:
Couldn't let you have all the fun.

Claire Fletcher:
Looks like you have a hit on your hands.

Shane Wolfe:
You think so?

Claire Fletcher:
Mm-hmm. You should take over the drama department instead of the wrestling team.

[She and Shane chuckle]

Claire Fletcher:
It's gonna be nice having you around now. Now that Murney's found his true calling.

Murney:
[singing] Climb every mountain/Ford every stream

Shane Wolfe:
It's gonna be my pleasure serving with you.

[He and Claire share a kiss]

Shane Wolfe:
[first lines] Atten-hut! Here's our man. Professor Howard Plummer. He's been kidnapped by a group of Serbian rebels. Yeah, I know we've been up for 72 hours, but I expect perfection. Nothing else. They enemy has a boat, 4 jet skis and a chopper.

Lulu Plummer:
Shane! You can't do this! Yon can't leave a man behind!

Seth Plummer:
Hold on, I got it.

[open bottle with milk awake Shane]

Zoe and Lulu Plummer:
Shane!

Zoe Plummmer:
Where's Mom?

Shane Wolfe':
Mom? I'll find her. You guys run and get help! [kids running in the Julie's car.] Hurry!

Lulu Plummer:
Are you sure you're gonna be okay?

Shane Wolfe:
Yes, Lulu. Go, get help.

Zoe Plummer:
Oh, my God! What do we do?

Seth Plummer:
Find a cop!

Zoe Plummer:
He's gaining on us.

Seth Plummer:
I'll handle it.

Seth Plummer:
Zoe, you're going too fast! You're not gonna have time to stop!

Zoe Plummer:
Who said anything about stopping? I'm parking.