Carry on Doctor

Biddle:
Nurse I dreamt about you last night.

Nurse Clarke:
Did you?

Biddle:
No, you wouldn't let me.

Dr James Kilmore:
Just as I thought. You fell on your coccyx.

Francis Bigger:
I did not. I fell on my back.

Dr James Kilmore:
Your coccyx is at the base of the spine.

Francis Bigger:
Well I've never heard it called that before.

Nurse Parkin:
Mr Bigger, whatever are you doing down there?

Francis Bigger:
Waiting for a number 13 Bus?

Dr. Tinkle:
It's an enigma Matron. An enigma.

Mr. Roper:
I'm not having another one of those.

Dr. Tinkle:
Oh. I still don't like the look of him.

Charlie Roper:
What they brought you in here for then.

Francis Bigger:
Oh just some pain in the back. Its a ooh, ooh dear.

Charlie Roper:
Last bloke in that bed had the same thing.

Francis Bigger:
Did he?

Charlie Roper:
Right up to the end.

Francis Bigger:
Well that's cheerful. I say one thing for them it's a nice warm bed.

Charlie Roper:
Should be, they only took him out half an hour ago.

Chloe Gibson:
Doctor is Mr Bigger going to be alright?

Dr. Kenneth Tinkle:
Are you his next of kin?

Chloe Gibson:
Oh no but any day now.

Dr. Kenneth Tinkle:
What do you mean any day now?

Chloe Gibson:
Well me and Mr Bigger have had an understanding for a number of years and we are kind of on the verge of you know what I mean!

Matron:
What a wonderful man you are, oh how I love you.

Dr. Kenneth Tinkle:
Oh how I love you.

Nurse Sandra May:
oh, I thought you might be a man coming in.

Nurse Clarke:
Sorry to disappoint you. This is my room... Are you a trainee?

Nurse Sandra May:
Yes, I was told to report to Fosdick ward right away. Say, will Dr. Tinkle be there?

Nurse Clarke:
Probably, do you know him?

Nurse Sandra May:
Know Him...

Nurse Sandra May:
To darling Sandra, my first date...

Nurse Clarke:
How nice.

Nurse Sandra May:
He saved my life, he's terrific he's a life giving doll.

Matron:
This hospital is getting to small for us Doctor!

Dr James Kilmore:
Well your not all that big Matron.

Mr. Barron:
Never again never, from now on it's the pill!

Man from Cox & Carter:
They don't want rubber sheets, they want straightjackets.

Francis Bigger well they were a present.

Matron. I can understand your reluctance to part with them.