Hollywood Shuffle

Uncle Ray:
There ain't nothin to it but to do it.

Bobby Taylor:
I believe this movie. A dude could jump off a mountain and not hurt himself, cause he did brace himself. And knew something about the levels of gravitivity and polarity.

Bobby Taylor:
There's always work at the post office.

Bobby Taylor:
I wish Tiny *would* bring his big fat ass out here...Tiny! I'm going to make it up to you, I'm going to be a star.

Tiny:
No, you're gonna be *seein’* stars.

Mr. Jones:
And I got a new one, Bobby! Winky Dinky Ho Cake.

Bobby Taylor:
Ho cake?

Mr. Jones:
Ho Cake! Hos got to eat too!

Bobby Taylor:
How can you tell if you have a good script?

Batty Boy:
Does your character…die?

Bobby Taylor:
No.

Batty Boy:
Then it’s a good script. Just one hit movie can give you success for life. It’s not about art! It’s about sequel!

Speed:
Welcome to Sneakin' In The Movies. My name is Speed and this is my homeboy Tyrone. And we are like movie critics and sh*t

Tyrone:
Well not really. Peep this. Each week me and my boy, you know, we go to different theaters and stuff and sneak in and check out the movie.

Speed:
Then we come back and tell you all what's up. Like if you should pay money and sh*t.

Speed:
[reviewing 'Dirty Larry'] Realism is important to me, and this was bullshit. This is the movie where the criminals wait for Dirty Larry to reach into his jacket and pull out a big ass gun. What did they think he was looking for, his American Express card?

Tyrone:
Make my day? Do fifty bullets in yo' ass make yo' day?

Bobby Taylor:
I have the respect of the community, and that makes me proud...So if you can't take pride in your job, remember, there's always work at the post office..

Mr. Jones:
Bobby, this ain't the 'Poot Butt League', man...ain't no 'Poot Butts' around here. This is not your average hot dog stand You know what this is? This is 'Winky Dinky Dog.' It sends chills up my spine every time I say it - Winky Dinky Dog! Bobby...say it with me...Winky Dinky Dog! WINKY DINKY DAAWWGG!

NAACP spokesman:
They'll never play the Rambos until they stop playing the Sambos.

The guy from the Dirty Larry clip:
What you say, honky sucker pig-head jive-turkey fool?

Jheri Curl:
Please! Gimme my activator!

Casting director:
Bobby...I need a little more "Black." You know what I'm saying? Umm, like...Stick your ass out more. Bug the eyes - you know how they move.

Protestor:
I think Bobby Taylor is a two bit goat smellin' spook, obviously from the Coon Repertoire Theater of America. We are out here sweatin' like niggas on the way to an election in Georgia because he chooses to bug his eyes, yank his dick, and pull his raggedy skid marked drawers out the cracka his Black ass! I have nothing else to say about Bobby Taylor!