Private Philbrick:
"Wow! That's the first time a salad's ever tossed me!"

Dr. Tanga:
I am Dr. Tanga, and that is Professor Puna.

Dr. Tanga:
We don't travel through time, but around it. Do you understand?

Pvt. Penn:
I don't, but maybe he does.

Pvt. Penn:
He has a warped mind.

Pvt. Penn:
So what are we gonna talk about, the weather?

Private Philbrick:
Yeah, whether we're gonna get outta here!

Pvt. Penn:
There's only one thing to do.

Private Philbrick:
What's that?

Pvt. Penn:
I don't know.

Pvt. Penn:
I've got blisters on my blisters!

Col. Rank:
You're soft!

Pvt. Penn:
Yeah, I'm soft - in the head!