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Orgazmo Quotes (1997)
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Famous Orgazmo Quotations
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South Park cocreator Trey Parker goes straight for the gross-out humor in this live-action farce set in the adult-movie industry. Parker stars as an innocent Mormon kid who gets sucked into the world of pornographic filmmaking and becomes an international sensation as the porno superhero Orgazmo, all the while hiding his secret life from his milk-fed fiancée. It's practically a one-man show for Parker, who directs, writes, stars, and even performs the self-penned theme song as frontman for his rock band, and perhaps he should have spread the responsibilities a little. As an actor he's surprisingly appealing--his dazed grin and bleached white surfer-dude hair give him an engaging air of innocence (he can also be seen, just as innocently endearing, in the sports farce BASEketball). Paired with longtime crony Dian Bachar, the diminutive actor who plays his superhero sidekick Chodo Boy, they bring a Hardy Boys naiveté to the rude world of mobbed-up producers and jaded adult film stars. But the film is only fitfully funny, with vulgar jokes that are often more disgusting than humorous and clumsy comic timing sabotaging promising scenes. Only rarely does it reach the heights of his hilarious cutout cartoon series, but when he delivers he does so with the carefully cultivated tasteless excess his fans have come to know and love. Matt Stone costars as a clueless photographer and adult film star; Ron Jeremy appears as a gross gangster henchman. --Sean Axmaker
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- Ben Chapelski: Dude! He's never gonna wanna have another orgasm again!
Joe Young: One more time for Jesus. »
- Ben Chapelski: I tell ya, Joe, there's nothing sadder than a sad Japanese man. »
- Ben Chapelski: Jesus!
Joe Young: Where? »
- Ben Chapelski: Let's see how you like my... COCK ROCKET! »
- Ben Chapelski: To the Orgazmobile!
Joe Young: What?
Ben Chapelski: My Buick Century! »
- Ben Chapelski: Whoa! DVDA shot! So, you up for some sushi? »
- Dave the Lighting Guy: Dude, I don't wanna sound like a queer or nothin', but I think you got a hot ass!
Joe Young: Thanks. »
- Dave the Lighting Guy: Everybody say, "Geddy Lee!"
Joe Young: Who's Geddy Lee?
Dave the Lighting Guy: Geddy Lee, best bass player EVER, come on! »
- Dave the Lighting Guy: I don't wanna sound like a queer or nothin', but I think Depeche Mode is a sweet band! »
- Dave the Lighting Guy: My name's Dave.
Sancho: I am Sancho. Don't mean to sound like queer, but I find fire very romantic. »
- Dave the Lighting Guy: Say, have you seen that movie Clash of the Titans?
Joe Young: Oh yeah, the greek mythology.
Dave the Lighting Guy: Hey, I don't wanna sound like a queer or nothin', but I think unicorns are kick ass! »
- Dave the Lighting Guy: That's some hot shit right there! »
- Dave the Lighting Guy: These guys kind of sound like Depeche Mode! »
- Doctor: Your balls have grown to the size of oranges and your cock has shrunk.
Maxxx Orbison: Tell me something I don't know doc.
Doctor: I am going to have to cut off your cock.
Maxxx Orbison: Ha ha ha! When I get out of here. Orgazmo you'll be facing Nuddered Man. Ha ha ha! »
- G-Fresh: Aw, dat hurt so much! »
- G-Fresh: Those punks from across the street came in the other day and just whupped my sorry black ass! »
- G-Fresh: You gonna get popped! if you keep ridin' me... »
- Georgi: My doctor says now I have enough silicone in my body to kill a small elephant! Isn't that cool? »
- Interviewer: What's the difference between Orgazmo and your previous porn titles, like Schindler's Fist?
Maxxx Orbison: I really think history will describe Orgazmo better than I possibly could. »
- Joe Young: Ben, superheroes that pray together stay together.
Ben Chapelski: Aw, what the fuck! »
- Joe Young: Ben, use your hamster style! »
- Joe Young: I am a bad, bad Mormon! »
- Joe Young: I'm not a superhero! I'm a Latter-Day Saint. »
- Joe Young: Oh... I, I can't say that.
Maxxx Orbison: Say what?
Joe Young: What are they called?
Maxxx Orbison: The Assfuck Twins.
Joe Young: I can't say that. Can we call them something else?
Maxxx Orbison: But they're the Assfuck Twins.
Joe Young: Well I know, but um, couldn't I call them the Naughty Twins or something?
Maxxx Orbison: No, you *couldn't* just call them the Naughty Twins. They're the Assfuck Twins. Why would you call them The Naughty Twins when they get fucked in the ass all the time?
Joe Young: Well, that's pretty naughty. »
- Joe Young: They want me to do a sequel.
Lisa: A sequel, to "Death of a Salesman"? Doesn't he die at the end of the first?
Joe Young: Yes, but he has a twin brother, and he wants revenge.
Lisa: Revenge? But, doesn't he kill himself?
Joe Young: No, no, that's what you were led to believe. He was killed by the C.I.A for selling smack... to Nazis...
Lisa: Wow! »
- Joe Young: We should call the police!
Joe Young: No, Utah. »
- Joe Young: We're from The Church of Jesus Christ.
Old Lady: Oh, the Mormons?
Joe Young: That's right. I'm elder Young and this is elder White.
Old Lady: Well, you two boys can just fuck right off.
Joe Young: Ma'am?
Old Lady: You heard me. Take that book of Mormons and shove it so far up your righteous asses that you choke, you soul soliciting pigfuckers. »
- Joe Young: You see, when the Mormons first arrived, they didn't have any money...
Joe Young: DVDA? »
- Lisa: Excuse me, could you tell me what movie this is?
Lisa: No, I'm from Utah. »
- Lisa: How could you have sex with all of those women?
Joe Young: I didn't it was a stunt cock
Lisa: A stunt cock? So you aren't touching all of those women's breasts?
Joe Young: Oh no they're all just special effects
Lisa: really?
Joe Young: ...no »
- Lisa: I hope you're happy in the life you've chosen.
Joe Young: Don't quote Dickens in my apartment! »
- Maxxx Orbison: Bring me my stunt cock. »
- Maxxx Orbison: I do what I do, and I make a lot of money. And I don't give a shit what I do to people, because they are all idiots!
Clark: Yeah!
Maxxx Orbison: Especially you, Clark, you pig-fucking hunk of shit!
Clark: Yeah! »
- Maxxx Orbison: Okay, we're sucking, we're sucking...
Dave the Lighting Guy: Yeah! SUCK THAT COCK! »
- Maxxx Orbison: Put your tongue in her mouth, for Christ's sake!
Joe Young: How would Christ benefit from me putting my tongue in someone's mouth? »
- Maxxx Orbison: What's your name, again?
Sancho: I am Sancho.
Maxxx Orbison: Look, I get a lot of people auditioning all the time. What makes you think that you'd be good enough for porno?
Sancho: I am Sancho.
Maxxx Orbison: Great... but what do you do?
Sancho: What do I do? I am Sancho.
Maxxx Orbison: And...?
Sancho: And there are many Jeffs in the world, and many Toms as well. But I... am Sancho.
Maxxx Orbison: And...?
Sancho: Are you Sancho? No you are not. Neither is Scott Baio Sancho. Frank Gifford is not Sancho. But I...
Maxxx Orbison: You... are Sancho!
Sancho: That's right.
Maxxx Orbison: Okay, you're hired. »
- Maxxx Orbison: Yeah, I just dig that Jesus guy! »
- Rodgers: I bet you want it, baby!
Saffi: Oh, yeah, I want it, baby! I am so badly wanting IT! »
- Saffi: Oh, give it to me, you big stud!
Rodgers: I'm not a stud!
Saffi: Huh?
Rodgers: I am not a stud! I'm...
Clark: ...JIZZ MASTER ZERO! »
- Sancho: Hey, it's Orgazmo!
Joe Young: I'm not Orgazmo.
Sancho: I am Sancho. »
- T-Rex: Hi fellas, I'm ready to fuck.
Orgazmo: Huh?
T-Rex: You want me on top?
Orgazmo: Uh... NO! I'll be on top!
T-Rex: You're gonna make me cum, or I'm gonna kick your butt!
Maxxx Orbison: Aaaand... action!
T-Rex: Oh! Come on nah! Come on nah! You make me so hot nah! You make me so hot! »
- T-Rex: You're gonna make me cum, or I'm gonna kick your ass! »
- Young Ben: Dad, I don't think I'm gonna do it Hamster Style anymore. »
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