Father Dan:
We don't harass the Lord enough. We should be more demanding, like a small boy asking his father for a bicycle. Ask for your inheritance. Ask for a miracle, a couple of miracles. Demand your share. Holler! Our rich father isn't very far away. After all, all you're asking for is a fair shake. It shouldn't take much of a miracle for that.

Mrs. Madigan:
Praying, was ye! What are ye, hollering hyenas? I thought you was Catholics! Ye'd better get down on yer knees and say yer prayers like decent Christians. Or else!

Slim:
There oughta be a law against lettin' ambulances have sireens!

Duke:
Why doncha write yer congressman?

Mike:
I sure hate to do it. That dame's sure nuts about that guy.

Hank:
What's the matter with you, you some kinda love nut?

Idaho:
Aw, to heck with the Monsignor. We're leavin' this money for Dysmas. We're callin' it his cut.

Slim:
You like to read so much, why doncha go over and knock off the public li-berry!

Slim:
I may be a louse, but I ain't gonna rob a church!

Mrs. McKenzie:
If they're parishioners, the car's as good as gone.

Father Dan:
The bigger the deal, the better it is for the side that's in no hurry.

Slim:
You know, I've never been up so early in my life. The city looks queer, like it ain't finished.

Duke:
When a hamburger starts to look better than eight thousand dollars cash, I gotta be starvin'.

Duke:
Be careful, I don't want you to bruise any o' them bills.

Slim:
We been hijacked!

Slim:
Ya know, I'm beginnin' to think that somebody up there HATES us!

Uncle Clete:
Does he look like a reverend to you?

Phineas:
He looks like he could USE a reverend.

Uncle Clete:
If you keep on bein' tricky like this, we're gonna lock you up fer a week, incommuni... endo!

Harrihan:
Nothing about Father Dan makes the least sense to me, nor to the rest of the police department, I might add.

Duke:
Naw, no thanks, we'll ride these.

Idaho:
If it's OK with all o' YOU, it's OK with all o' ME.

Idaho:
If you give Father Dan his old job back, we'll walk the old chalk, pious as a corpse. We show results.

Mrs. McKenzie:
That St. Dysmas is a powerful saint.

Father Dan:
And as the boys say, he sure can boot in the winners.