Dil To Pagal Hai

[Nisha is dressing when Rahul bursts in]

Rahul:
[searching her room] Hey, Nisha, have you seen my cassette? It has a very important music piece on it, I think I left it somewhere in your room... Where the hell is the cassette?

Nisha:
Rahul, you have no manners! Don't you know you're supposed to knock before coming into a room where a girl is dressing?

Rahul:
Girl? What girl?

Nisha:
ME! Stop it, Rahul, I'm serious!

Rahul:
Hey, relax, I know very well that you're a girl! Besides, you also had come into MY room when I had nothing on...

Nisha:
That's different!

Rahul:
How so?

Nisha:
Oh, shut up!

[Nisha is shopping for clothes with Rahul, and has draped several possible purchases over him, making Rahul look like a human clothes-hanger]

Rahul:
[talking to a man noticing him] Are you shopping? Alone? VERY GOOD! Don't ever go shopping with a girl!

Nisha:
[drunk] Take off my shoes and give me money!

[first lines]

Rahul:
What is love?

Pooja:
Love?... Love is life.

[while Rahul and the troupe celebrate Nisha's birthday, Pooja begs Ajay to tell her about a girl he likes]

Ajay:
Okay, okay, okay... You see that waiter serving water?

[He points to a waiter serving glasses of water]

Pooja:
Yeah?

Ajay:
Well, if he comes here with a glass of water, I'll tell you all about her!

[They watch the waiter - soon, there is only one glass left on his tray... ]

Pooja:
Oh my God... Excuse me, a glass of water please!

Ajay:
That's cheating!

Pooja:
So what? Everything is fair in love and war!

[the waiter brings her a glass of water]

Rahul:
[passes by, takes the glass] Thank YOU!

Pooja:
HEY!

Ajay:
[laughing] Everything is fair in love and war!

Ajay, Pooja, Nisha, Rahul:
[singing] Dil to pagal hai / dil deewana hai... the heart is crazy / the heart is mad...

[standing in the rain]

Rahul:
Pooja... when you laugh...

Pooja:
Listen, I know I look good...

Rahul:
No, when you laugh, it starts to rain... [He grabs her umbrella and hurls it away]

Rahul:
[dropping Pooja home late] I hope your uncle is asleep, so we won't have to listen to his singing... [Pooja laughs]

[last lines]

Ajay:
My name is Ajay... yours?...

Nisha:
I'm Nisha...

Ajay:
Nisha... are you married?

Nisha:
WHAT?

Ajay:
Hello, fatty, how are you?

Pooja:
Shut up! I'm not fat!

[Rahul and the troupe celebrate Nisha's birthday]

Rahul:
[at the bar] Okay, everybody, tequila time!

Nisha:
[coming over] What are you all drinking?

Rahul:
Tequila!

Nisha:
Can I have a drink?

Rahul:
No, only men are able to drink this stuff! You go back and sit down there!

Nisha:
No, give me a drink!

Rahul:
Hey, Nisha, don't bother us, just go and sit down!

Nisha:
Rahul, today is my birthday...

Rahul:
Oh... happy birthday!

Nisha:
Thank you... I can do whatever I want, eat whatever I want and drink whatever I want, understand?

Rahul:
Nisha... okay, it's your birthday! Waiter, bring one more glass...

[All the members of the troupe line up, glasses ready in their hands]

Rahul:
Okay, 1... 2... 3... GO!

[Everyone downs three tequilas - and make faces, trying to adjust to the alcohol. Rahul is the only one unaffected by the tequila]

Rahul:
[laughing at Nisha] Ha! What did I tell you? Girls aren't able to handle this stuff!

[Nisha suddenly starts giggling drunkenly]

Nisha:
One more!

Rahul:
[to himself] Rahul, you're dead!...

Rahul:
[showing Nisha a shirt she selected and he's tried on] Okay? Happy? [Nisha starts laughing at Rahul]

Rahul:
What's so funny?

Nisha:
Where are your jeans?

Nisha:
[raving at God and throwing rocks in every direction] YOU ARE BAD! YOU ARE BAD! What have I ever done to deserve this? You are bad! You are bad! [Rahul grabs and holds her arms to make her stop]

Rahul:
I'm sorry, Nisha...

Nisha:
Rahul, please don't say sorry, otherwise I'll cry...

Rahul:
I'm sorry, Nisha... [Nisha slowly sags against Rahul and silently starts crying]

Nisha:
I won't dance for your play!

Rahul:
So what? We'll get another dancer and replace you!

Nisha:
Ah, go on! There's no dancer as good as I am! [cut to Pooja dancing]