Wer zuletzt lacht, lacht am besten

Archibald Kr?glein:
[after he was disturbed by some kids playing Indians] See, miss, I am an edicator and therefore I am allergic to children...

Tina:
[interrupts him] To children? Me too. I take the pill.

Andy:
[enters angry the boss' office] By all love to children, but no, I sure can take a lot but this goes definitelly too far and if you think that I stay here longer, then...

[suddenly spots the new manager, the attractive Sabine, smiles enthusiasticly to her]

Sabine Frobenius:
[smiles back] Then what? What is it? Say it.

Andy:
No, got it. Make love, no resignation.

Leopold:
The telephone equipment is very simple, ever idiot understands it, even me.

General Pusch:
Mr. Concierge, I need to talk to you urgently.

Leopold:
Sorry, my young colleague will service you now.

General Pusch:
I see, you are new here?

Robby Mertens:
Yes sir.

General Pusch:
Well, show me what you can do: Check out the best connection to Fukushima.

Robby Mertens:
Pardon me, where to?

General Pusch:
To Fukushima. Never heard of it? No? Young man, this is a real hole in your education. Fuku...

[gets interrupted]

Claudia:
Mr. Concierge?

General Pusch:
No, you listen to me now: Fu-ku-shi-ma in Japan. And a bit hurry. Quick, quick.

Andy:
My Sabine.

Robby Mertens:
Or mine. By all friendship, dear Andy, but here I won't ask you for permission.

Andy:
Not me, but your wife.

Robby Mertens:
Who?

Andy:
Well, your darling spouse is greeting you warmly and when you don't send money soon bad luck will appear.

Robby Mertens:
My spouse?

Andy:
Well, that's what it says: To Mr. Jack Neuhaus, Hotel Seefels Palace. Right?

Robby Mertens:
I'm married?

Andy:
Good that it comes into your mind right now.

Leopold:
Seems like somthing from the hotel slipped into your luggage.

?ltere Frau:
What do you mean 'slipped'? Have you never heard of souveniers?

Archibald Kr?glein:
You don't seem to have many guests. When my wife comes, she loves company.

Theo Frobenius:
We are overbooked.

Archibald Kr?glein:
Then why are here so few guests? Explain it to me.

Theo Frobenius:
That's because they are not here. I mean they are not actually here.

Archibald Kr?glein:
So they are no there.

Theo Frobenius:
Oh yes, they are there. [a bit louder] There they are. On the daytrip. On the tour around the lake, included in the hotel price.

Archibald Kr?glein:
Interesting. When do you come back?

Theo Frobenius:
Late, very late in the evening, you won't see anything. You will sleep at that time.

Sabine Frobenius:
Drink a glass with me.

Robby Mertens:
I'm sorry, I'm on duty.

Sabine Frobenius:
And when I allow it?

Robby Mertens:
Only if you command it.

Theo Frobenius:
[after his shoes went in the water] Dear Kr?gelein, everything is in order. Your shoes will be fished, dryed and ironed.

Theo Frobenius:
If we don't get any guests I can hang myself.

Robby Mertens:
That's not a problem.

Theo Frobenius:
I know, hanging myself is not a problem.

Bernd Ander:
Every day a man takes a bath, even if he doesn't have to do that.