Casual Sex?

Ilene:
And everyone they've had sex with.

Ilene:

Melissa:
Gee, I'm a lot more experienced than I thought I was!

Ilene:
What do you miss most about sex?

Ilene:
Orgasm? I love orgasms.

Melissa:
I've never had sex with someone I didn't know. For that matter, I've never said, "Wow, that felt really great."

Vinny:
Stacy, how nice to see you. Do you have a few minutes? I mean, it occurred to me, I don't even know where you work.

Vinny:
Yeah, you know, your career plans, your dreams, your aspirations... I really want to hear all about them.

Vinny:
Would you maybe want to share something with me about your childhood, perhaps?

Vinny:
I respect your strength, Stacy, and I think you've got a lot of potential!

Dr. Goodman:
The good news is that your Blue Cross will cover this visit. The bad news is that you have herpes simplex I and II, trichomonas, gonorrhea, acute

Dr. Goodman:
immune deficiency syndrome related complex, vulvar lesions, secondary syphilis, venereal warts, and a potentially unbearable case of crabs.

Melissa:
But he was only the third guy in my life, and the first one didn't count!

Dr. Goodman:
Oh, all contact counts.

Melissa:
But I thought I had safe sex.

Dr. Goodman:
Oh, no sex is safe enough for you, Melissa. Well, enjoy the rest of your vacation.

Matthew:
Melissa, did you know that women experience 63% more heightened sensitivity during the arousal phase than during climax itself?

Melissa:
Really? I like all the phases.

Melissa:
What's the matter?

Matthew:
We have a problem.

Melissa:
Well, what is it?

Matthew:
I can't. I'm sorry.

Melissa:
Is it me?

Matthew:
No no no, it's not you. It's me. I'm not attracted to you.

Melissa:
Oh.

Matthew:
Now, I don't want you to take this as a rejection, but as an acceptance between two people whose needs are profoundly incompatible. And you're not alone. I devote an entire chapter to this in my book.

Melissa:
I really wish you hadn't seen that.

Matthew:
I lied. I was extremely attracted to you. I just didn't want you to see my unusually small penis.

Melissa:
Just once I'd like to wear a sexy white dress blowing all around me and not have men run away screaming. Just once I'd like to have the kind of sexual experience where you don't have to go to the bathroom and cry afterwards.

Melissa:
Men too?

Vinny:
If you'd like me to provide you with some vital statistics that can't be measured in a public place, I'd be happy to do so.

Vinny:
Hey, need a lift?

Vinny:
I was just driving around the neighborhood. Last night I did something-- Look, it's like this. It's Christmas Day, I'm sitting around my house, right, I'm all alone... so, uh, I hop in the limo... 24 hours later, I wind up in Chicago. And I say to myself, Vincent, where the hell you going? That's when it hits me... I'm coming to see you.

Vinny:
Hey, only 4 days and, what, 18 speeding tickets.

Vinny:
Y'know, I used to have it all figured out. It's like women changed when I had my back turned.

Matthew:
Melissa, you're not leaving us, are you? Melissa, seeking escape from a challenging environment points to potentially very serious personality deficits. You really ought to consider analysis--

Matthew:
B*tch!

Ilene:
Haven't you ever had an orgasm?

Melissa:
Oh, yeah, sure-- No, not really. I mean, not with someone else in the room.

Melissa:
Uh, this is one that the kids at school told me. Why did the chicken go halfway across the street?

Vinny:
Why?

Melissa:
He wanted to lay it on the line. --You're not laughing.

Vinny:
Oh, not yet, not yet. Inside, it's building, it's building. About a half hour from now I'll be rolling all over the beach, I'm telling you. You won't be able to stop me. I'll be in hysterics.

Melissa:
You know, Matthew's a psychologist. I just love therapy. I think everyone should be in therapy.

Matthew:
That would be good for me. Actually, I'm here to do reseach for a book I'm writing, on the psycho-sexual tendencies of pre-menopausal females.

Vinny:
Yeah, me too.

Nick:
Okay, that's okay. But let me tell you, you're making a big mistake. 'Cause I am going to make it.

Nick:
I'm going to be huge. I'm going to be bigger than huge! I'm going to be on the cover of Rolling Stone magaz-- no, forget that. I'm going to be on the cover of Time magazin-- no! Forget that... I... I... am going to have... *more fans than Elvis*!

Nick:
Yeah! And I won't even be dead! Think about it.

Ilene:
Mm-hmm.