Dorothy Parker

United States writer noted for her sharp wit (1893-1967)

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Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.
That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.
I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.
A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika.
Brevity is the soul of lingerie.
Coolidge is dead"
"How could they tell?
Every year, back come Spring, with nasty little birds yapping their fool heads off and the ground all mucked up with plants.
His voice was a intimate as the rustle of sheets.
Hollywood money isn't money. It's congealed snow, melts in your hand, and there you are.
I can't talk about Hollywood. It was a horror to me when I was there and it's a horror to look back on. I can't imagine how I did it. When I got away from it I couldn't even refer to the place by name. Out there, I called it.
I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true.
I might repeat to myself slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations beautiful from minds profound - if I can remember any of the damn things.
I require three things in a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.
I shall stay the way I am because I do not give a damn.
I went to a convent in New York and was fired finally for my insistence that the Immaculate Conception was spontaneous combustion.
I'm never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on the roster of Those Who Do Things. I don't do any thing. Not one single thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don't even do that any more.
If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised.
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
Men seldom make passes At girls who wear glasses.
Men seldom make passes
At girls who wear glasses.
Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song, A medley of extemporanea And love is a thing that can never go wrong And I am Marie of Roumania.
Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,
A medley of extemporanea;
And love is thing that can never go wrong;
And I am Marie of Romania.
She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.
Sorrow is tranquility remembered in emotion.
The affair between Margot Asquith and Margot Asquith will live as one of the prettiest love stories in all literature.
The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires.
The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant --- and let the air out of their tires.
The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant--and let the air out of the tires.
The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
The only "ism" Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.
The two most beautiful words in the English language are ``check enclosed.'
There's a helluva distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.
They sicken at the calm that know the storm.
They sicken of the calm that know the storm.
This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.
Those who have mastered etiquette, who are entirely, impeccably right, would seem to arrive at a point of exquisite dullness.
Trapped, like a trap in a trap.
Work is the province of cattle.

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