The Hollywood Knights1980

[Dudley is calling his mother from Tubby's]

Dudley:
Mother?

Dudley's Mother:
Dudley?

Dudley:
Mother, I am calling you to tell you I will be out rather late tonight. In point of fact, I might not be in at all.

Dudley's Mother:
You're not in bed, dear?

Dudley:
Mother, I have a assignation with a young lady. I am going to explore the boundaries of my manhood. Mother, I am going to get laid.

Dudley's Mother:
You're going to be late, dear?

Dudley:
Not late, mother, laid; the past participle of the verb 'to lay'. Mother, I am going to screw someone.

Dudley's Mother:
Oh! [faints]

Dudley:
Now, I just have to figure out how.