The Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human1999

The Male's Mother a:
She's so nice!

The Male:
Yeah, yeah she is nice.

The Male's Father:
She has beautiful eyes.

The Male:
Thank you.

The Male's Father:
So, did you f*** her?

The Male's Mother a:
What the hell's the matter with you?

The Male's Father:
What? What? What did I say? I asked if he f***ed her.

The Male's Mother a:
Of course he's f***ed her! Wouldn't you f*** her? Hell, I'd f*** her and I'm not even into that!

The Male:
Mom!

The Male's Mother a:
What? I'm defending you! Your father's the one causing the trouble!

The Male's Father:
I just wanted to know if those were real hooters or not!

The Male's Mother a:
Well of course they're real! You can't buy hooters like that.

The Male:
Okay, if you two continue to embarrass me, we're leaving.

The Male's Mother a:
[dejected] There's just no pleasing you.