When Louis Met... Keith Harris & Orville in Panto2002

Louis Theroux:
You'll never stop, Keith, it's in your blood, you can't stop. You can't help yourself.

Keith Harris:
Well, they say you never give up showbusiness, it gives you up. When people don't want you anymore, you're finished. But sometimes you've just gotta kick 'em up the backside so that they'll know that you're still around. And they go "Ooh, he's very good" And when all the others can't the jobs, they have to come back to the people that can the jobs.

Louis Theroux:
See there - I'm gonna stop you there, Keith, because that's where it sounds a bit funny - "All the others can't do the jobs" - That sounds like you're being arrogant. Why don't you just say you can do the job and you're good at your job, why do you have put everyone else down?

Keith Harris:
When I say people can't do the jobs, how can I explain that... It does sound arrogant, and I suppose it is in a way. But other people - and I shouldn't get going on about it, it does sound like I'm a bitter and twisted old queen, doesn't it, but I'm not - who go out there, and get paid a lot of money, who can't do the job.

Louis Theroux:
But that's not for you to worry about.

Keith Harris:
Well, it is when they're taking my job away from me.

Louis Theroux:
Why are they taking your job away from you?

Keith Harris:
Because they're out there doing it, and I'm doing...

Louis Theroux:
Who?

Keith Harris:
Oh, there's load of people, there's no point, I can reel off 10 people. If people can con the audience, let them con them and make fortunes...

Louis Theroux:
See, there you go again, you can't help it. [Keith laughs] It's all that bile that's down there. It's not good for you.

Keith Harris:
I know.

Louis Theroux:
You've got a lovely wife, lovely kids, lovely house, you're working regularly, getting paid decent rates.

Keith Harris:
Got everything I want, mate.

Louis Theroux:
No, you haven't got everything you want because you wanna be back on TV, don't you?

Keith Harris:
Well, that would be nice, but it's frustrating. Perhaps that's the word I'm looking for.