Lincoln2012

Abraham Lincoln:
What will you do after the war, Corporal Clark?

Cpl. Ira Clark:
Work, sir. Perhaps you'll hire me.

Abraham Lincoln:
Perhaps I will.

Cpl. Ira Clark:
But you should know, sir, that I get sick at the smell of boot-black, and I cannot cut hair.

Abraham Lincoln:
I've yet to find a man who could cut mine so's it'd make any difference.

Pvt. Harold Green:
You've got springy hair for a white man.

Abraham Lincoln:
(chuckling) I do. My last barber hanged himself. (Green laughs) And the one before that. Left me his scissors in his will.