33 1/3 Revolutions Per Monkee

Wizard:
Who are you?

Wizard's woman:
[screaming] I am woman! [takes a bite from a symbolic apple]

Wizard:
We have the knowledge, evil though it be, To twist the mind to any lunacy we wish. Through this Electro-Thought Machine, I'll demonstrate exactly what I mean. We'll take the means of mass communication, use them for commercial exploitation. Create the new 4-part phenomena: 4 simple minds with talent, little or none, And through the latest fad of rock and roll, conduct experiments in mind control! On an unsuspecting public they'll be turned! I'll brainwash them, and they'll brainwash the world!

Wizard:
Hm. Interesting fantasies they have. Fixation with toys, schizophrenia, regression.

Charles Darwin:
And now my masterpeace of evolution. And here they are, the son of the hat of the book of the film of the tram... of the telephone directory of the same name.

Brian Auger:
Wait a minute, Jack, hold on a minute, stop the show. Look, this brainwashing bit has got completely out of hand. You know, lot, I'm Brian Auger and this is Julie Driscoll. And we don't want any more of this sort of brain washing business, what we want is complete and total freedom. Complete and total freedom. Now, do you realize what that means?

Julie Driscoll:
Yeah. Utter, bloody shambles.

Wizard:
Far too mechanical! Rythmically wrong! I'll teach you to sing another song.

The Monkees:
[singing] In the beginning there was Darwin...

Charles Darwin:
Here's my card, number and hallway it is.

The Monkees:
[singing] Then came... the fish.

Charles Darwin:
But we liked the chips, of course. Haha!

The Monkees:
[singing] Dinosaurs and brontosaurs followed.

Charles Darwin:
Yes, it's in my book: Origin of Species.

The Monkees:
[singing] And so did an evolution!

[repeated line]

The Trinity:
I don't believe it!