Juggernaut1974

Corrigan:
Would you mind telling me why we're traveling in circles?

3rd Officer Jim Hardy:
In circles, sir?

Corrigan:
Yeah. A little while ago the waves were coming from the front of the ship, now they're coming from the side.

3rd Officer Jim Hardy:
Well, it's that kind of sea, sir. North Atlantic, you know.

Corrigan:
A half hour ago the sun was on the port side, now it's on the starboard - is it that kind of sun?

3rd Officer Jim Hardy:
They must be checking the steering gear - just routine.

Corrigan:
Uh-huh. And about that explosion this morning?

3rd Officer Jim Hardy:
Just blowing Number 2 Boiler, sir.

Corrigan:
Buddy, I am by profession a politician: the mayor of a rather large city, as a matter of fact.

3rd Officer Jim Hardy:
Yes, sir?

Corrigan:
In my line of work you have to learn how to lie with remarkable precision. You also have to know how to recognize a lie when it bites you in the ass... and I have just been bitten.

3rd Officer Jim Hardy:
I'll, uh, convey your complaint to the captain, sir.