Sexy Beast2000

Aitch:
Look, with this pill, they say you take it and that's it. Your hair don't grow, you don't go bald, it stays the same. You have your hair cut once, in whatever style you want, and it stays like that for the rest of your natural life. It's completely revolutionary.

Jackie:
What if you get fed up with your style, you berk?

Aitch:
Ahh... Well, that's where the antidote comes in. The whole process is reversible. You just take a different pill. Now, I'm not saying this is gonna happen next year but it will happen, it's definitely coming. Hairdressers are shitting themselves.

Jackie:
[cracking up laughing] Shut up!

Aitch:
They did a test with three monkeys, right? Gave 'em all a Beatles-style haircut. They've been living with that cut for the past two years. And apparently, they're very happy with it.