An Idiot Abroad2010

Taxi Driver:
I hope you do not value your life too much and got good life insurance. The brakes on this car just failed. It's the worst car I ever bought. It's British and I never thought a car could be made that bad.

Karl:
Right.

Taxi Driver:
What brings you here?

Karl:
Well, I'm going on the train, the Trans-Siberian Railway. It's things to do before you die. Have you been on it?

Taxi Driver:
Why would I want to do something that's totally predictable? I'll leave it to you British. You will be packed in a smelly carriage with Russians who will not wash for a week but they will drink a lot. Siberia is nothing, just one huge field.

Karl:
You're not selling it to me.

Taxi Driver:
Anyway, what did you want to see? The Red Square?

Karl:
Whatever you think is worth seeing here.

Taxi Driver:
Nothing.