M*A*S*H1972

Father Francis Mulcahy:
Me, advertise? Huh! I can think of better ways of spending two dollars.

Cpl. Maxwell 'Max' Q. Klinger:
It's not spending. It's investing. With the flock that's gonna come flocking in, you'll need a duffel bag for a collection plate.

Father Francis Mulcahy:
Oh, very well, Klinger. I'll take the ad.

Cpl. Maxwell 'Max' Q. Klinger:
Terrific.

Father Francis Mulcahy:
Always willing to help an enterprising young man get a start.

Cpl. Maxwell 'Max' Q. Klinger:
I got the whole thing beautifully designed in my head. I'll tell you how it comes out.

Father Francis Mulcahy:
Won't I be able to see it?

Cpl. Maxwell 'Max' Q. Klinger:
You want to see it! Oh, foolish me. I completely forgot to mention subscriptions.

Father Francis Mulcahy:
Subscriptions?

Cpl. Maxwell 'Max' Q. Klinger:
Glad you asked. Because I like you, I'm instituting a man-of-the-cloth discount. My special pearly rates: two dollars a month or twenty-five dollars a year.

Father Francis Mulcahy:
All right! All right, all right. Here's another two dollars.

Cpl. Maxwell 'Max' Q. Klinger:
Thank you, Father. One more dollar, and we're even.

Father Francis Mulcahy:
What? I thought you said two dollars a month!

Cpl. Maxwell 'Max' Q. Klinger:
That's for subscriptions. Now I gotta raise the advertising rate. Circulation just doubled.

Father Francis Mulcahy:
Klinger, how would you like to see your circulation cut off?

Cpl. Maxwell 'Max' Q. Klinger:
Wonderful. See? Another satisfied customer.

Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce:
Congratulations. You've just committed a very original sin.