Saved by the Bell1989

Zack:
Goo-oo-oo-oo-ood morning, Bayside! Hey, and all you kids cuttin' school in the Palisades and at the beach, this is Wolfman Zack. [Points to Screech, who then howls like a wolf] Hey, it's Bayside's freshest, hottest, hippest new station, KKTY-FM, Tiger Radio! [Points to Screech, who then roars like a tiger]

Jessie:
[Cuts to Jessie's segment] Bad food hits Bayside, students hit bathrooms. This is Jessie Spano for KKTY News. I caught up with Mr. Belding running out of the cafeteria today, and he assured me that green meat would no longer be served.

Lisa:
[Cuts to Lisa's segment] Hi, this is Lisa, your Galloping Gossip, with everyone you wanna know that's none of your business. Flash! Debbie DeMarco's new curves came with Debbie's new sweater.

Kelly Kapowski:
[Cuts to Kelly's segment] Hello, this is Kelly Desire. It's evening, the candles are lit, and you're with the one you love. All that's missing is that special romantic song. [Points to Screech, who puts on a rock 'n' roll record, she grimaces]

Screech:
[Cuts to Screech's segment; he speaks with a strange accent] Thunder and lightning raged outside the old Victorian house. There was a scream... [Screams] Evelyn's heart pounded... [Imitates heart beat by hitting his chest] as she slowly opened the bedroom door. [Imitates creaking door] She saw an axe, and recognised the face of...

Zack:
[Stops background music] Well, that's all the time we have today. Tune in tomorrow for another excitement installment of...

Screech:
Screech's Mystery Theater!

Zack:
And now, look alive, sports fans, 'cause on deck it's Tiger Radio's sportiest reporter, A.C. Slater!

Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater:
[In a stilted monotone] Hey. Thanks, Wolfman. Okay. First things first. Let's check out the old scoreboard, huh? I mean, hey, ha, gimme a break, it's not *that* old, right? [Honks horn, Kelly jumps] Anyway. In local, uh, high school action, it was - it was, Bayside 5, Valley 4. I guess that means we won, right Math majors? [Honks horn again]

Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater:
[a while later, the rest of the gang are all clearly bored and tired] This *is* A.C. Slater. And just remember, fans, in the airport of life, sports is just the baggage. Think about it. [Honks horn, Zack puts music on] Right. So what do you think?

Zack:
[All exchange glances] Uh... we're thinkin' about it.

Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater:
See, Preppie. I told you I was good. [Leaves]

Zack:
Hey, guys, I think I know what'd help Slater.

Jessie, Lisa, Kelly Kapowski:
What?

Zack:
A muzzle.