The Colbert Report2005

Stephen Colbert:
Tensions have been rising between Afghanistan and the West over the fate of an Afghani man sentenced to death for converting from Islam to Christianity, casting Afghanistan in a negative light. Which brings us to our number one threat... Jesus! Jesus is such a powerful and appealing Messiah that Muslims can't help but convert to Christianity, and follow his teachings! But now, our Lord and Savior is jeopardizing our President's legacy. Afghanistan is Bush's success story! Where we toppled a repressive regime and replaced it with Western democracy. Thanks to Jesus, all that good will might be going right down the tube! So I call on the Son of God, the one true Christ, to just back off a little! The President's on your side, Sir! You should be on his! Leave the Muslims alone and save the true power of your glory for when we need it... midterm elections!