The Thick of It2005

Malcolm Tucker:
Right, Terri, you're gonna give a press conference in 90 minutes and you're gonna apologise. There's your statement, learn it.

Terri Coverley:
I... I organize the press conferences, I don't give them.

Malcolm Tucker:
God, right, ok well, seen as you're not used to this, I'll go through it for you, ok? What happens at a press conference is this - a bunch of press people are gonna appear, they got things called cameras and microphones and mobile phones and hangovers and bad breath. Then you are gonna walk out and you're gonna read from what we call a "prepared statement". In that you will say "I'm really f***ing sorry for sounding like a hairy arsed docker after twelve pints. I promise that I will never call an 8 year old girl a c*nt again. Can we now just draw a line over this and f***ing move on? Thank you". Everybody goes home and then we wait and we see what happens. The best case is you get keep your job, although you will forever be known as The Sweary Woman of Whitehall.