Bob & Tom Comedy All-Stars Tour2007

Nick Griffin:
I'm sure there's some divorced people here, yeah. Sure.

[whoops and hollers]

Nick Griffin:
Absolutely. Nothing to be ashamed of. Lots of people get divorced. Tons. Especially these days. So many people get divorced these days, now it's the people that stay married that really seem strange. "25 years? Oh, my God. What happened?"

[laughter]

Nick Griffin:
"Don't you know you can get out of it?"

[laughter]

Nick Griffin:
Embarrassing, though. My wife and I, we only lasted three years. We were supposed to be together until one of us *died*! I never even had a fever!

[laughter]

Nick Griffin:
She felt I was, uh... too down, I was too negative. Well, this divorce should help.

[laughter]

Nick Griffin:
She said I had changed. You ever hear that from your partner? "You've changed. You didn't used to be like this. If I'd known you were going to be like this, Nick, I never would have gone to bed with you." Well, guess why I didn't tell you?

[laughter]

Nick Griffin:
I was trying to move some product.

[laughter]

Nick Griffin:
Marriage is hard, man. Hard. No one tells you... marriage is so hard, Einstein got divorced. Did you people know that? I didn't. Albert Einstein, arguably the most intelligent man who ever lived, got divorced. They should tell you that before you get married. It shouldn't be "Do you love her? Do you want to spend the rest of your life with her?" It should be "Do you think you're smarter than Einstein?"

[laughter]