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[Celia and Alan are having a discussion about politics. Celia is rather surprised to find that Alan's views are more left-wing than hers]Alan: You're going to tell me next you voted for Margaret Thatcher.Celia: Well, you can't have like Michael Foot? In his anorak at the Cenotaph?Alan: A very intelligent man, Michael Foot.Celia: Oh, he can't have been that intelligent or he wouldn't have gone round looking like a scarecrow. I didn't dislike Tony Blair.Alan: [groans] Oh!Celia: Until he muckied his ticket in Iraq.Alan: Now, Gordon Brown. There's a much-maligned man.Celia: [scoffing] Gordon Brown? Trying to get everybody to like him, with his phoney grin? And he's Scottish.Alan: Now, there's an unassailable political argument!Celia: Well, it hardly needs pointing out he buggered up the economy.Alan: No, he didn't. He did not. He had vision.Celia: Oh God. I can see this is a subject we're going to have to avoid.Alan: No, don't worry. I'll teach you.Celia: You damn well won't.Alan: Yeah, we'll buy you a copy of the Guardian.Celia: You can keep your Guardian.Alan: I thought I spotted a Daily Mail lurking in your recycling bin.Celia: What's wrong with the Daily Mail.Alan: What's wrong with it? What's right with it?Celia: Do you know, I'd never have had you down for red-hot Labour. I thought you had more about you.Alan: Do you know the good thing about David Cameron is that even *he* knows he's an arse! Every time he opens his mouth, you can see him thinking "I was born an arse. I'll die an arse. But at least I *know* I'm an arse."

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