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Frank Burns: [Hawkeye has thrown Frank a surprise party to buy off Margaret] Pierce, Mclntyre, this is the happiest night of my life, buddies!Hawkeye: You want to share the happiness, Frank?Frank Burns: With the whole world!Hawkeye: Sign this. [Hands him Klinger's Section 8 discharge papers]Frank Burns: Sure! What is it? [reads papers]Frank Burns: Never! You're asking me to let a pervert out of the army?Hawkeye: Oh, right, Frank. By all means, let's keep the perverts *in* the army.Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre: Klinger's not a pervert!Margaret: How do you know?Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre: Because I'm one and he's never at the meetings!

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