Earl Hickey: Dad said there was one other woman in town that flirted with him. The waitress at the diner. So we headed over to give him one more chance.Carl Hickey: [Getting out of the car] You stay here. I think those other women would have been game if I hadn't had my son with me. I think it creeped them out a little.Earl Hickey: [Narrating] I wan't my dad to feel better but I was hoping he wouldn't find a girl. I was also hoping he didn't get hit again because he was out of socks and I'd been wearing mine for a week.Carl Hickey: [Very excited heads back out to Earl waiting in the car] She's coming out as soon as she freshens up. I told you this was a slamdunk! I'm running across the street for condoms.Earl Hickey: Da-da-da-Dad, Dad wait! We really should talk about this. Ah- I don't know if I'm cool with this actually happening! [Yelling after Carl in the parking lot]Earl Hickey: [Earl his the bell tinkle and turns toward the restaurant] Patty?Patty: Ha-Hey Earl!Earl Hickey: When did you start working here?Patty: Oh. A couple months ago I had to pickup a second job. My hookin' took a bit of a hit when Bush [Then President Bush] monkeyed with the daylight savings schedule.Carl Hickey: [Carl slaps a box of condoms down on the pharmacy counter] [With a cocky jaunt of the head] I'll be needing these for use this evening with a young lady who delivers on the promises she makes with her eyes.Diana: I thought you needed the largest kind we had. [Snarky]Carl Hickey: Just ring it up, pecker-tease...Earl Hickey: [Back to Earl and Patty] Listen I just don't know if sex with a hooker is what my dad'd lookin for. Not that your not great... I've heard wonderful things...Patty: Thanks. Word of mouth is very important in my line of work. It's right up there with eye contact and concealing sores.Carl Hickey: [Carl approaches stage right] Hello! I see you met my son! I just had to run across the street for a few personal items. And a little something for you! [Hands Patty a heart-shaped box of candy]Patty: Thank you! [Patty immediately turns the candy box over] Oh, they have nuts in 'em! Oh, that's sweet but some of my clients have allergies so I need to keep this [Patty circles her mouth with her index finger] a peanut free zone. [Hands nuts back to Carl]Earl Hickey: Dad, Patty's a hooker.Carl Hickey: [In denial] No... no... no... no... No she's not she's a waitress. A waitress who flirts with me.Patty: Daytime hooker, nighttime waitress.Carl Hickey: Dammit! This was not how this was supposed to work! It's not revenge sex if I have to pay for it!Patty: [as Carl and Earl get into the car] If you change your mind sometimes I have coupons in the Penny Saver. It says massage, but...Carl Hickey: I'm not changing my mind! [Slamming car door]

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