Game of Thrones, Season 4

Jaime Lannister:
To tell you the truth, this isn't so bad. Four walls. A pot to piss in. I was chained to a wooden post covered in my own shit for months.

Tyrion Lannister:
Is that supposed to make me feel better?

Jaime Lannister:
Maybe a bit. I'm sorry I didn't come sooner.

Tyrion Lannister:
It's complicated, yes. So how is our sister?

Jaime Lannister:
How do you think? Her son died in her arms.

Tyrion Lannister:
Her son?

Jaime Lannister:
Don't. [Pause] You know what's coming?

Tyrion Lannister:
My trial for regicide. Yes, I know. I know the whole bloody country thinks I'm guilty. I know that one of my three judges has wished me dead more times than I can count. And that judge is my father. As for Cersei, well, she's probably working on a way to avoid a trial altogether by having me killed.

Jaime Lannister:
Now that you mention it, she did ask.

Tyrion Lannister:
So, should I turn around and close my eyes?

Jaime Lannister:
Depends. Did you do it?

Tyrion Lannister:
The Kingslayer brothers. You like it? I like it. You're really asking if I killed your son?

Jaime Lannister:
Are you really asking if I'd kill my brother? How can I help you?

Tyrion Lannister:
Well, you could set me free.

Jaime Lannister:
You know I can't.

Tyrion Lannister:
Then there's really nothing else to say.

Jaime Lannister:
What do you want me to do? Kill the guards? Sneak you out of the city in the back of a cart? I'm the Lord Commander of the Kingsguard.

Tyrion Lannister:
Sorry, I'd forgotten. I'd hate for you to do something inappropriate.

Jaime Lannister:
Inappropriate? You're accused of killing the king. Freeing you is treason.

Tyrion Lannister:
Except I didn't do it.

Jaime Lannister:
Which is why we're having a trial.

Tyrion Lannister:
A trial. If the killer threw himself before the Iron Throne, confessed to his crimes, and gave irrefutable evidence of his guilt, it wouldn't matter to Cersei. She won't rest until my head's on a spike.

Jaime Lannister:
Not just yours. She's offering a knighthood to whomever finds Sansa Stark.

Tyrion Lannister:
Sansa couldn't have done this.

Jaime Lannister:
She had more reason than anyone in the Seven Kingdoms. Do you think it's a coincidence she disappeared the same night Joffrey died?

Tyrion Lannister:
No, but... Sansa's not a killer. Not yet, anyway.