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Rumour has it that, after his election, Trump declared: "Yesterday, we were on the edge of the abyss but today, we have taken a big step forward!"
Trump: "Madam, if you were my wife, I'd poison your tea!" Clinton: "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd drink it!"
A Belgian motorist was complaining that his turn signal had been defective and was going :"once it worked!, once it didn't work!, once it worked!, once it didn't work!, once it...."
I would readily admit that women are superior to us if it could deter them from pretending to be our equals!
Marriage is like restaurant; hardly have you been served that you're looking at the neighbour's plate!
Experience is that marvellous thing that allows you to recognize a mistake when you've already made it many times!
For fifteen thousand dollars, the psychiatrist has relieved me of what I had: fifteen thousand dollars...
In my life I've been an altar boy, a republican militant and a bar manager; that just shows you that I heard bullshit!
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if it wasn't the case, they would have married too
I dont't like to be at home; to such an extent that when someone tells me "make yourself at home!", I go back home...
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can usually see better than he can think! (unknown)
The civi service is a place where, in the stairs, those who arrive late bump into those who leave early!
The unluckiest man in the world was Youri Gagarin: he left from Russia, revolved seventeen times around the word to fall in Russia again!...
Pupils had to create a rhyme for today's lesson. When it's his turn, Gilbert goes: "I was in the pond behind the hillocks and I had water up to my knees!" Teacher:"Interesting Gilbert, but that doesn't rhyme!" Gilbert:"I know it doesn't and I'm sorry Mrs Walter, but it's not my fault if there wasn't enough water!"
Artichoke is a real dish for the poor..; it's the only one that, when you have finished eating, you have more in your plate than when you started. (Michel Colucci known as Coluche)
Studies are freaking expensive! And yet I was careful... I was one of those who studied the less! (Miche colucci known as Coluche)
Technocrats are guys whom, when you ask them a question and when they have finished answering, you don't understand the question you asked any more! (Michel Colucci known as Coluche)
My computer displayed the surprising and at least disconcerting following message: "Error. No keyboard. Press F1 to continue!"
Asked about his beautiful gold pocket watch, Woody Allen said :"I'm very attached to it, my grandfather sold it to me on his deathbed!"