Mr. Freedom

Dr. Freedom:
You know that the world is divided in two parts. On one side is Right, and on the other side is Wrong. Wrong is Red. And Right is...

Mr. Freedom:
Red, white, and blue!

Dr. Freedom:
Yes. And in the middle, we have the Maybes and the Don't-Knows. First, we've two objectives. Make the Reds cry uncle...

Mr. Freedom:
Uncle Sam!

Dr. Freedom:
Yes. Then maybe the Maybes and the Don't-Knows will wake up and fight for Right. For Right is might, and might is...

Mr. Freedom:
Freedom!

Dr. Freedom:
Let me tell you about the French. They are 50 million mixed-up, sniveling crybabies who haven't stood on their two feet since Napoleon, and that wasn't yesterday. And Napoleon wasn't even French.

Mr. Freedom:
He was Corsican!

Dr. Freedom:
That's right, boy. So the French are the white man's burden. OUR burden. We've had to carry them through two world wars already, and we're damn well gonna have to carry them through the next.

[Mr. Freedom's theme song]

Mr. Freedom:
F-R-double-E-D, D-O-M spells Freedom! We fight for freedom, for one and for all! It's you-and-me-dom, and ten foot tall! Freedom, freedom, and oh-can-you-see-dom, we'll always beat 'em with star-spangled freedom!

The French are the white man's burden.