Married with Children1987

Al:
[on phone] Hello, Jim's Fish, Chips & Insurance? How much would it cost to add my son to the plan? How old? Let me see... Bud, how old are you?

Bud:
Sixteen, Dad.

Al:
He is sixteen... What? If you think I'm gonna pay that much, you're as stupid as those cats you trap and call tuna... You know, when you insult my wife, Jim, you don't hurt me.

Peggy:
Well, what'd he say, Al?

Al:
Nothing I haven't said myself... Seriously Jim, I need to ask, is this the best you can do for a lifetime friend and someone who did not tell the police what your catch of the day really was? Oh ho, well if you want to be that way you can take your insurance and stuff it, all of it! [Al hangs up]

Al:
There! Al Bundy takes guff from no one!

Bud, Peggy, Kelly:
Cheap, cheap, cheap!

Peggy:
Al, aren't you worried about being uninsured?

Al:
Peg, we don't need insurance. Insurance is like marriage. You pay and pay, and never get anything back! Besides, the car isn't worth more than 100 bucks with both kids in it.