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Clancy: Lil! Lil: Dad! Clancy: I came to apologize and to give you these. [Clancy gives him old testicle monsters that are coughing] Clancy: They belonged to your grandfather. Lil: Dad, did you ever think maybe I wanted my own pair of testes and not Grandpa's wrinkled old sack? – Saul of the Mole Men (2007)	added by timothyj.29104 8 days ago
Lil: We're out of time! I'm destined to be intersexed! – Saul of the Mole Men (2007)	added by timothyj.29104 8 days ago
[The testicle monsters turned into butterflies] Lil: Oh, no! They're metamorphosizing! Saul: Man, these balls sure have a lot of wrinkles. – Saul of the Mole Men (2007)	added by timothyj.29104 8 days ago
Bertrum: I hereby dedicate this memorial to the heroic workers who have made the ultimate sacrifice for the success of Project Thunder Hole. [another digger gets killed by a memorial statue] Bertrum: Thunder Hole! Whoo! All: Boo! Hiss! Dr. Lawrence 'Brad' Perkins: Word on the street is the casualty rate is too heavy. Bertrum: Well, what am I supposed to do about it?! Dr. Lawrence 'Brad' Perkins: I recommend we consult with Malone, the geologist. He may be able to devise a safer method for upwards digging. Bertrum: Fine! Bring him here, then. Dr. Lawrence 'Brad' Perkins: Uh...we're looking for him. In the meantime, I recommend you sign these personalized letters to the families of the crushed workers. Bertrum: I just made a whole speech! What do these people want from me?! – Saul of the Mole Men (2007)	added by timothyj.29104 8 days ago
Clancy's Wife: Clancy? Clancy: Not now, honey! I'm -- Clancy's Wife: Don't you "Not now" me. Lil has run away. Clancy: What?! But I-I-I -- Clancy's Wife: That's right. Because you were too wrapped up in your crusade to take him testicle hunting. Clancy: But I -- Clancy's Wife: Don't you "But I" me. You're so obsessed with saving mole society, you've forgotten how to be a father to your only child! Now he could end up a hermaphrodite! And isn't one of those enough for this family?! Clancy: You're right. I've been a fool. But don't worry. I've got a feeling I know where to find him. [Clancy leaves] Clancy's Wife: Psst! Your, uh...tampon string is hanging out. Clancy: Ah. Thanks. – Saul of the Mole Men (2007)	added by timothyj.29104 8 days ago
Clancy: Bob, how many more diggers have to die before you admit that you were wrong? Bob: 406. Clancy: What's that? Can I ask how you arrived at that number? – Saul of the Mole Men (2007)	added by timothyj.29104 8 days ago
Gary Bunda: What time did we tell everybody to get there? Lee: [whispers] Gary Bunda: My ass and testicles are blocking the door. Can you open a portal to another TV? Lee: [whispers] Gary Bunda: Not Troy's. What did we talk about? We gonna backtrack on all the work we did? Lee: [whispers] Gary Bunda: I'm not burning them. This is a char. I'm releasing the natural sugars. I don't need you to backseat cook me, okay. Lee: [whispers] Gary Bunda: It's really weird that nobody's wailing on my defenseless testicles right now. Oh, here it comes. Oh, god, they're starting. Ow, ow, ow! Oh, my nuts! My damn nuts! [Gary actually sees he mistakenly burning the food on the grill] Gary Bunda: I am burning these. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Satan: Oh, hey, hey, hey! Where's the barbecue, boys? Dizzay: Well, I guess it's been canceled. Satan: Canceled? Why? Dizzay: Take a look. [Satan sees Gary stuck inside the TV with his swollen balls] Satan: [laughs] They're really trying to work it out there, aren't they? And I had these prop balls made to mess with Gary. Satan: Troy, do you mind? Troy: I can probably get up if -- [Satan sits on Troy's swollen balls which it's close enough] Satan: A toast, to Gary and Lee. So, has anybody hit on that your-mother-sucks-ding-dongs-in-Hell chick yet? – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Gary Bunda: Everybody makes mistakes, Lee. Can you ever forgive me for not satisfying you sexually? [crying] I can get better at it. I can push more, I can... – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Gary Bunda: Lee and I are having a bit of a housewarming this weekend inside the TV, where we bone. I really hope you can stop by, Claude. Lee can pull you through the TV is she doesn't melt the rest of you first. Claude: If I do come, I'll take Troy's TV. Gary Bunda: Troy has a TV? Claude: Yeah. Gary Bunda: That's really interesting. [Gary sees Troy's workplace to see if doesn't have love bondage with Lee] Gary Bunda: That's a pretty big TV. What is that, a 50-incher? Troy: Yeah. Something like that. Gary Bunda: That's pretty big. You gonna come by the barbecue on Saturday? Troy: Yeah, I think I'm gonna be pretty busy that day. Gary. Gary Bunda: That's really weird. You never turn down a party. And normally somebody turns around when somebody's talking to them. [Troy reveals to Gary that he also makes out with Lee by showing his swollen balls] Gary Bunda: I knew I saw you buying a hoodie. Troy: We were gonna tell you after the barbecue. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Gary Bunda: Uh, you wanted to see me? Satan: Gary, get in here! Gary Bunda: You must be Lee. Been seeing her around the office. Satan: Troy tells me that you two are living together, inside a shack, inside your television?! Gary Bunda: I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Don't blame Lee. She's got nothing to do with it. I talked her into it. And I'm just -- Lee: [whispers] Gary Bunda: Yeah, I'm -- I'm -- I'm -- I'm -- I'm not sorry. Satan: What? Lee: [whispers] Gary Bunda: I'm your most valued employee, right? Lee: [whispers] Gary Bunda: I can't even, I cannot do this... Gary Bunda: Lee and I are a platonic team together and we, uh... Lee: [whispers] Gary Bunda: We're dating. Satan: [laughs] Go on and date her. Gary Bunda: What? Satan: I don't give a sht. You got some real balls on you, Gary. Gary Bunda:* Yes, they are very swollen. Satan: Yeah, they are. Gary Bunda: I think I sat on a bee. They do look bigger, right? Satan: Listen, I didn't care about you two hooking up. I just said no inter-office romance because she's got that curse, you know? Gary Bunda: What curse? Satan: The curse where you get elephantitis of the nut-sac when you have sex with her. Gary Bunda: But we can be open about dating each other? Satan: Oh, my gosh, of course! Send out the invitations! Gary Bunda: Yes! We did it! I love you, baby. [accidentally bumps his swollen balls while hugging Lee] Oh, ah, okay, alright. I got like, accidentally hard and it makes them hurt worse. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
[Gary and Lee do sex inside of Lee's house on Gary's TV] Troy: I can still hear you through the TV! Gary Bunda: Hit mute, Troy! – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Gary Bunda: [whispers to Lee] I love you, too. I really do. But I think we're moving too fast. You're moving too fast. You are literally an unseeable blur. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
[Gary and Lee does sex while everyone in the office works] Gary Bunda: Ohhh, here comes the soup. Troy: We can all hear every word that's coming out of your mouth! Gary Bunda: Mind your own business! I'm only in here. I'm filing difficult stuff with my co-worker. Troy: Filing your dick under the folder marked vagina? Gary Bunda: You're really distracting me in a bad way, Troy. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
William: [whispers to Gary] He thinks we're gonna have inter-office romance with that thing? [Gary punches William] Gary Bunda: Say it again! Say it again! Call her a thing again! Call "her" a thing again! Who wants it?! – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Satan: How are you ladies settling in? Lee: [whispers] Satan: Claude touched you? Claude: Wait, no! Uh, she touched me first. She melted my hand. I was just helping her set up her e-mail. [Lee shows evidence by bringing the book "Leaves of Grass" and a condom that Claude handed out to her] Satan: Oh, Claude. Poetry and colored condoms? Gentlemen, I did a whole presentation on this, and inter-office romance is strictly forbidden. Claude: Well, I have a bombshell to drop. Gary moved the copier in front of his cube so that he and Lee -- [as Claude was about tattle the sex between Gary and Lee, Lee uses her body powers from her leg that grew an hand under the table by burning Claude's crotch] Satan: G-Gary, what's he talking about? Gary Bunda: I don't know. I don't know what's he's talking about, Satan! And now he's smoking, and I find it disgusting. [fake coughs] Satan: Gary's right, Claude. Please take the smoking down to the loading dock. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
[Regan the Demon Girl makes an important speech] Regan the Demon Girl: Your mother sucks ding-dongs in Hell. Your mother sucks ding-dongs in Hell. Your mother sucks ding-dongs in Hell. Your mother sucks ding-dongs in Hell. Your mother sucks...ding-dongs in hell. Satan: Thank you, Regan, for the very enlightening and informative presentation on what everybody's mothers have been doing, down here in Hell. Troy: I got nothing out of that. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Gary Bunda: Who's been digging into the pork wall? Haazim, I thought you guys were Muslims. Do I got to smell people's breath? Haazim: You did. Gary Bunda: I did this? [referring to the pork wall] Haazim: It's taken you many months, but this is almost all you. [Gary grabs one of the pork] Gary Bunda: I just want to motorboat it. You guys are the luckiest group of people in this whole place. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Gary Bunda: Who's been digging into the pork wall? Haazim, I thought you guys were Muslims. Do I got to smell people's breath? Haazim: You did. Gary Bunda: I did this? [referring to the pork wall] Haazim: It's taken you many months, but this is almost all you. [Gary grabs one of the pork] Gary Bunda: I just want to motorboat it. You guys are the luckiest group of people in this whole place. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Troy: Hi, honey. I'm Troy. You got a burger to go with that shake? Regan the Demon Girl: Your mother sucks ding-dongs in Hell! Troy: [paralyzed] What? You're right. She does, and I should go call her right now. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
[Claude tries to flirt with a ring monster] Claude: Hi, I'm Claude, Satan's number two. Got you a welcome gift. "Leaves of Grass." It's a collection of poems by Walt Whitman. Walt's actually down here, 'cause he's gay. If you ever want to meet him, I have an in. His poems are so, uh, sensual, don't you think? Claude: I also got you a bookmark. [gives her a condom] Safety first. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
[after watching Benji's orientation video about sexual harassment] Satan: Any, uh, any questions? Gary Bunda: Why are we watching this video? There's no women around here. Satan: Times are changing, Gary. Women are just as capable as men in the workplace. So I'm bringing in some stupid bimbos to work with you guys. All: [cheering] Satan: Any other questions? Yeah, William? William: My teeth are falling out. Satan: That's more of a statement, William. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
[Benji does an orientation video about sexual harassment in Hell] Benji: Hi, I'm Benji. And those of you who know me know I'm crazy about young boys. But that doesn't impact my ability to sexually harass women in the workplace. Benji: Hey, Becky. That's a dynamite pantsuit. Becky: Well, thank you. [laughs] Benji: Practice with me. Say "Do you need a man's help, sugar boobs?" All: Do you need a man's help, sugar boobs? Benji: Why don't you let me help you unfasten that bra, so you can better see the pornographic picture I just sent you? Becky: I would like equal pay for equal work. Benji: [laughs] Geez, is it that time of the month already? Now fetch me some coffee, Becky. I'm done with you sexually. Becky: Okay. – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 10 days ago
Satan: So, you got all of our golden fiddles back? Gary Bunda: Yeah. In a way, yeah. Absolutely. Satan: What do you mean "in a way?" [cuts to next scene where Gary and Satan gets back in Satan's Office where Todd is the headmaster of Hell] Toad: Ah, is he the workman? I want a display case built right here, big enough for all four of my golden fiddles and four souls. [laughs] Satan: [to Gary] Who is this? Toad: I will see your face turn alabaster when you find the servant is the master. "Wrapped Around Your Finger," The Police, 1983 Grammy Award Winning. Satan: Todd, Eater of Worlds. Gary Bunda: His name's Todd Stodski. Satan: Mm-hmm. Toad: Ooh, actually, while you're at it, could you get rid of this, 'cause my name's Todd. Not Satan. [laughs] – Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell (2013)	added by timothyj.29104 13 days ago

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