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Kirra, get that ass MOVING!

The Chronicles of Riddick ()

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Ow she gave me a wedgie!

iCarly (2007)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

But he can't dance.

Footloose (1984)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Prisoner:
You like to look down on people, don't you.

McAvoy:
Down is where some people are.

The Newsroom (2012)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Frankie:
Christ on a cracker.

Grace and Frankie (2015)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Marty:
There's no shame in hiding. Oh - I'd better go call my mother.

Independence Day (1996)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Ur rolls have all got scabs on em and ur tomato sauce is all watered down.

Quadrophenia (1979)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

The only way to win a war is to be as awful as they are. The only thing that concerns me is waking up one day and discovering we have become worse than they are.

Guns of Navarone (1961)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Handsome Rob yelling at the idiot actor running his lines while sitting at a red light. The light turns green and the guy just keeps on running his lines.

Handsome Rob yells at him:
"Oy! It's green! Green! (honk, honk) Unbelievable!"

Italian Job (2003)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Rizzo:
You should shave your cunt because he probably gave you crabs.

Grease XXX: A Parody (2013)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Coraline:
How can you walk away from something and still come back to it?

Coraline (2009)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Charlie Croker:
Mr. Bridger will drive them into the sea.

Italian Job (1969)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Dr. Peter Blood:
It seems that you're continually doing me favors. Faith, I don't know why.

Arabella Bishop:
Neither do I. Yes I do. It's because you're so very grateful and always thank me so prettily.

Dr. Peter Blood:
Sure now, you don't blame me for resenting you and your favors.

Arabella Bishop:
This is interesting. I've had men tell me they had reasons for admiring me... and some few have even laid claims to reasons for loving me. But for a man to store up reasons for resenting me... how refreshing! You must tell me a few of them.

Dr. Peter Blood:
First, is reason enough: you bought me. I've had no lack of experiences in my time; but to be bought and sold was a new one. I was in no mood to thank my purchaser.

Arabella Bishop:
That I can understand. Go on.

Dr. Peter Blood:
I've resented you because your name's Bishop. My thoughts have lumped you with your uncle. How was I to know, be dad, that a devil could have... that a devil could have an angel for a niece.

Arabella Bishop:
From a resentful man that is a pretty fair compliment.

Captain Blood (1935)

added by anonymous
2 months ago

Napoleon:
I was in this Position at the battle of Marengo, I lost the Battle at 5 o'clock, BUT I WON IT BACK AGAIN AT SEVEN

Waterloo (1970/I)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Red:
[narrating] Not long after the warden deprived us of his company, I got a postcard in the mail. It was blank, but the postmark said Fort Hancock, Texas. Fort Hancock... right on the border. That's where Andy crossed. When I picture him heading south in his own car with the top down, it always makes me laugh. Andy Dufresne... who crawled through a river of shit and came out clean on the other side. Andy Dufresne... headed for the Pacific.

Shawshank Redemption (1994)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Becky:
Why did you and Mama stop living together Daddy. Why'd you separate?

Aren't you going to answer me?

G.W. McLintock:
Nope

Becky:
It's sort of my business I think.

G.W. McLintock:
I don't

Becky:
Is it another woman? It usually is.

G.W. McLintock:
At your age you always know what's usual.

Becky:
Is it Mrs. Warren?

G.W. McLintock:
I don't want to start laying the law down your first day back. But I'll have no more such talk. The first time I saw Mrs. Warren was last week. She has a job here at which she's very good.

And, I hope you'll have the good manners not to pry into other people's business, your mothers and mine.

McLintock! (1963)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Capt. Keith Mallory:
These are fine people.

Guns of Navarone (1961)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Mrs Weasley in the form of a howler:
RONALD WEASLEY!!!! HOW DARE YOU STEAL THAT CAR!! I AM ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED!! YOUR FATHER'S NOW FACING AN INQUIRY AT WORK AND IT'S ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT!! IF YOU PUT ANOTHER TOE OUT OF LINE, WE'LL BRING YOU STRAIGHT HOME!!

Oh and Ginny dear, congratulations on making Gryffindor, your father and I are so proud.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Hazel:
'Twas like where you're from weren't never there. Where you're going doesn't matter. And where you are ain't no good unless you can get away from it!

Wise Blood (1979)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Michael Scofield:
It's not where Oswego is, it's what is in Oswego.

Prison Break (2005)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Conan:
What gods do you pray to?

Subotai:
I pray to the four winds... and you?

Conan:
To Crom... but I seldom pray to him, he doesn't listen.

Subotai:
[chuckles] What good is he then? Ah, it's just as I've always said.

Conan:
He is strong! If I die, I have to go before him, and he will ask me, "What is the riddle of steel?" If I don't know it, he will cast me out of Valhalla and laugh at me. That's Crom, strong on his mountain!

Subotai:
Ah, my god is greater.

Conan:
[chuckles] Crom laughs at your four winds. He laughs from his mountain.

Subotai:
My god is stronger. He is the everlasting sky! Your god lives underneath him.

[Conan shoots Subotai a skeptical look. Subotai laughs]

Conan the Barbarian (1982)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Cochese:
Awwww. Get the books!

(To Pooter)

Cooley High (1975)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Trooper Joe Roberts:
We're all doing time -- even the screws...

The Hill (1965)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

Joel Goodson:
It was great the way her mind worked. No guilt, no doubts, no fear. None of my specialities. Just the shameless pursuit of immediate gratification. What a capitalist.

Risky Business (1983)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

[Cut to the sun beating down on the dunes, in the scene where Simba ran home across the desert. "Busa" theme plays. Pumbaa runs in slow motion across the desert sands, frame-for-frame exactly how Simba ran in TLK 1. Suddenly, Timon dashes at normal speed past the slow-motion Pumbaa; Pumbaa skids to a stop in confusion. Timon stops and looks back at him with humility. Pumbaa looks at him questioningly.]

Timon:
Friends stick together to the end.

[Pumbaa gasps joyfully; they rush together and embrace, sobbing. Camera trucks out to show the silhouettes; Timon pauses the movie.]

Timon:
What was with the running? If you can call that "running."

Pumbaa:
I was giving you time to catch up.

Timon:
[choked up] Aw, you big lug.

[Timon reaches out to Pumbaa's shoulder; they embrace, and Timon resumes the movie.]

Pumbaa:
[enthused] Hop on, buddy. We got a fight to catch! [He grabs onto Pumbaa's ears; Pumbaa rears up and paws the air like a mustang.]

Timon:
Let's whip some grass.

[The camera rises from the scene as Pumbaa gallops off (at full speed now) toward the dark and drought-ravaged Pride Lands, as dramatic and heroic music rises.]

Timon:
[narrating] This is the stuff of legends. An epic struggle—the place where heroes are born. Pumbaa... this could be our finest hour.

[Hawaiian drums sound; cut to Timon in drag, doing the "Hawaiian War Dance" distraction routine from TLK 1.]

Timon:
Luau!

If you're hungry for a hunk of fat and juicy meat

Eat my buddy Pumbaa here because he i—

[Timon pauses the movie.]

Timon:
[voice-over; embarrassed] Heh heh. Let's just cut to the chase, shall we?

Pumbaa:
Oh, sure.

[Cut to Timon and Pumbaa screaming and fleeing before a pack of hunger-mad hyenas. The movie resumes.]

Timon and Pumbaa:
Aaaaahhh!

[Timon and Pumbaa lead the hyenas over a rise and into a cave, screaming. Silence falls as the hyenas search for them inside the cave, holding for a beat.]

Banzai:
What the—

[A powerful explosion sounds inside the cave, with a cloud of dust billowing out the cave entrance.]

Hyenas:
Aaaaahhh! Get outta the way!

[The hyenas flee the cave in a panic. Timon and Pumbaa emerge triumphantly; Pumbaa snorts like a bull. Timon rides on top of his head, looking like General Patton. "Ride of the Valkyries" by Wagner echoes in the score.]

Timon:
[inhales deeply] I love the smell of Pumbaa in the morning.

[Suddenly the ground begins to crumble under their feet.]

Ma:
[underground] Hey, hey, hey. Move your tush, honey!

[Pumbaa skips out of the way of the newly opened hole; Ma and Uncle Max are standing in it.]

Timon:
[astonished] Ma? Uncle Max?

Ma:
Oh, Timmy!

Uncle Max:
[floored] Timon?

Timon:
What are you doin' here?

Ma:
Looking for you! [Embraces Timon] Aww. Mommy's here.

[Pause for a beat while Uncle Max glowers disapprovingly and fingers the flower in Timon's hair; Timon grins sheepishly. Uncle Max grumbles under his breath.]

Timon:
Well, let me introduce you to my best friend. [making introductions] Pumbaa: Ma, Uncle Max. Uncle Max, Ma: Pumbaa.

Pumbaa:
[gasps at a sight beyond them] Aah! Look there's Simba! And that must be his uncle Scar!

[Viewpoint switches to show the confrontation between Simba and Scar at the tip of the promontory about to take place; Simba is being backed toward the precipice.]

Timon:
Oh, good, they're talking things out. Which is how it should be. You know, I have a feeling everything's gonna be just fine.

[Timon turns away from the scene. Lightning strikes the base of Pride Rock, igniting the brush, just as Simba slips off the tip of the rock, barely holding on. Timon winces.]

Pumbaa:
Ooh!

Timon:
[resigned] On the other hand...

Pumbaa:
[narrating, as the scene from TLK 1 plays out on top of the promontory] The hyenas are up there protecting Scar. What do we do?

Timon:
Well, I've got a plan...

Ma:
[magnanimous] How can we help?

Timon:
[in pep-talk mode] Ma, Uncle Max: You're going to dig a trap. We're going to need—dare I say it?—tunnels... lots and lots of tunnels. And Pumbaa. You and me... we've gotta get those hyenas away from Simba.

Pumbaa:
[wagging his tail, barely suppressing his excitement] Ooh, ooh! And lure them into the trap?

Timon:
Ho ho! Nothing gets past you. Come on, Pumbaa. Let's ride.

[Timon hops up on Pumbaa; they gallop off as heroic music plays.]

Ma:
[reflective] Y'know, Something's different about Timon...

Uncle Max:
You think? [frantic] He's wearin' a dress! ["Dress" echoes several times.]

[Cut to Scar running away from Simba, with the hyenas chasing after, while sparks from the fire fly all around. They all wind their way to an area near the top of Pride Rock, where the hyenas corner Simba, who snarls at them. Timon and Pumbaa look down on them from a ledge above them.]

Timon:
[loudly enough for the hyenas to hear] Hey, Pumbaa! What do you call a hyena with half a brain?

Pumbaa:
Ah ha ha. Uh, beats me, Timon. What?

[Camera switches to Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed, listening for the punchline.]

Timon:
Gifted! [Timon and Pumbaa laugh; Shenzi and Banzai scowl, but Ed bursts out laughing. Banzai smacks him.]

Ed:
Aah ha ha—ohh!

Banzai:
They're talkin' about us!

Shenzi:
[menacing, advancing on them] For your last meal, you're gonna eat those words.

[Pumbaa and Timon are grinning from the ledge above; suddenly they both zip away, leaving dust clouds in their own shapes that linger for a few moments. They scream as they run down the side of Pride Rock, until they reach a tunnel entrance.]

Timon and Pumbaa:
Yaaaaahh!

Timon:
[landing] Uhh!

Pumbaa:
[landing] Ooh!

Timon:
[calling into the hole] Ma! I think we got their attention!

[Camera pans down into the underground, where Uncle Max is busily digging, and Ma is carrying support beams.]

Ma:
Not yet! Keep stalling!

Uncle Max:
[singing obsessively] Digga tunnah, dig, digga tunnah...

[Cut back to Timon and Pumbaa, backed up against a rock wall and illuminated by the red firelight.]

Timon:
[panicked] Okay...

[Khachaturian's "Sabre Dance" plays; Timon begins juggling sticks and dishes, while Pumbaa gestures toward him and grins. The hyenas stop dead, bewildered.]

Banzai:
[nonplussed] You gotta be kidding me.

[The music stops; Timon stands with the dishes balanced on the sticks on his nose and hands, spinning.]

Timon:
[even more panicked] Now, Ma?

Ma:
[from underground] Need more time, honey!

[Offenbach's "Cancan" plays. Timon and Pumbaa link arms and dance, grinning tensely. The music peters out as the hyenas glare at them and look insulted.]

Timon:
[grasping at straws] Uh... freestyle!

[Hip-hop music plays as Timon and Pumbaa start breakdancing. The hyenas laugh and applaud.]

Shenzi:
Ooh, encore, encore!

Banzai:
No, no, no. You mean, "entree, entree."

Shenzi:
No, you right. Let's just eat 'em. [The hyenas advance on them]

Timon:
[at the edge of his wits] Is it ready yet, Ma?!

Ma:
[from underground] Not yet! Keep stalling!

[Timon nervously drums his fingertips together, chatters his teeth, and bites his nails as the hyenas approach with sinister laughter. Timon gets an idea; he waves his arms in a "time-out" signal.]

Timon:
[approaching the hyenas] Waaait, wait, wait, wait. Hold on a second.

Pumbaa:
[confused, then severe] Uh, Timon? What are you doin'?

Timon:
[theatrically, down on one knee, proposal-style] Shenzi Marie Predatora Veldetta Jacquelina Hyena... would you do me the honor of becoming... my bride?

[The hyenas are dumbfounded; Pumbaa gulps, his mouth falling wide open. Shenzi pauses for a beat before responding. Broadway farce-style music begins, the dialogue falling into the music's patter rhythm.]

Shenzi:
I don't think so!

Timon:
[milking it] Shenzi Marie, please. I know what you're thinking: "We're too different." "It'll never work." "What will the children look like?"

[Cut back to Pumbaa, who is still frozen with shock, mouth wide open.]

Shenzi:
[disgusted] Ooh, that violates so many laws of nature.

Timon:
[backing up against the wall] Listen to me! The problems of a couple of wacky kids like us don't amount to hill of termites in this nutty circle-of-life thing. And so I ask you: If not now, when? If not me, who? [miserably; pleading] I'm lonely.

Pumbaa:
[tapping him on the shoulder; sniffling, putting the best face on his shattered emotions] Can I be your best man?

Banzai:
I say we skip the wedding, and go straight to the buffet!

[As the hyenas draw near, Ma pops up from the hole.]

Ma:
Now?

Timon:
[nonchalant] Sure, if you're ready.

Ma:
[noticing the hyenas] Oh! [drops back down into the hole; calls to Uncle Max] Now, Max, now!

[Uncle Max kicks out one of the tunnel supports, which falls and takes out the rest in a series, like dominoes.

Uncle Max:
Hyenas in the hole!

[The ground under the hyenas crumbles and collapses; they back off, yelping, as the crack follows them rapidly.]

Shenzi:
Huh?

Hyenas:
Huh.

Banzai:
Aaaaahh!

[The crack suddenly stops expanding as one of the supports hits an embedded rock and doesn't fall. The hyenas stop retreating, and look back at Timon and Pumbaa angrily. Uncle Max and Ma pop out of the hole.]

Uncle Max:
I need help. It didn't work.

Banzai:
[approaching again] Hey, it works for me!

[Ma and Uncle Max are backed up against the rock wall.]

Ma:
[panicked] What are we gonna do?

[Timon first looks terrified; then he looks at the ground under the hyenas, noticing where the crack ends up. He steels himself, then runs headlong at Shenzi, aiming between her legs. Lightning flashes as Ma yells after him.]

Shenzi:
What?!

Ma:
Timon, no!

[Timon dives into the crack and rushes along it, pursued by the hyenas' growls and snapping teeth. He makes it past, and the hyenas lose interest in him, focusing back on Pumbaa, Ma, and Uncle Max; the meerkats hug each other in terror.]

Shenzi:
Let's get 'em.

[Timon dives for the last tunnel support; it crumbles on impact. The hyenas leap for their victims; Pumbaa, Ma, and Uncle Max gasp and steel themselves as lightning flashes. As Shenzi lands right in front of them, however, the ground gives way, followed by the whole ledge area collapsing into a huge crater, swallowing all the hyenas whole. The hyenas slide through a huge subterranean tunnel complex, screaming, until they disappear into the darkness. Camera switch to the peak of Pride Rock, where Simba is just hurling Scar over the edge; Scar crashes down the cliff face, passing Pumbaa, Ma, and Uncle Max as they watch.]

Pumbaa:
[with finality] I'd say Scar is down and out.

Uncle Max:
[triumphantly] We did it. We did it!

Ma:
[consumed with worry; shaking Uncle Max by the chest hair] Where's Timon? Where's my baby? He's hurt! [she flings Uncle Max away] Oh, no! Oh, no! He's dead! [She grabs Pumbaa by the nose and slams him to the ground, looking downright insane] Or worse! W-we gotta find him. We've gotta find him!

Timon:
[emerging from the hole] It's okay, Ma.

Ma:
[grabs Timon and shakes him] Oh, please. It is not okay! Don't you tell me it's okay! [recognizing him; gasping] Timmy! [embraces him in a bear hug] Mmm-mm! My son... the hero.

[She reaches up as though to comb his hair, but catches herself; she looks at her hands in embarrassment.]

Timon:
[lowering his head so she can reach it] You missed a spot. [She combs it and dusts him off]

Uncle Max:
[overcome; crying] That's so beautiful! [grabs Timon and hugs him tight around the neck]

Timon:
[eyes bugging out] Choking... Not breathing...

Note:
All this is written and belonged from lionking.org's script of The Lion King 1 1/2 and the scene is 7 minutes and 15 seconds.

The Lion King 1½ (2004)

added by anonymous
3 months ago

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